Cassie Nova • 11-27-15

Posted on 27 Nov 2015 at 7:20am

Cassie gives thanks, even in times of tragedy. Oh, and bitches a little, too


What is up with all you bad bitches? Me, I’m just chillaxin’ and wishing I was as cool as I pretend to be. You could never tell what a nerd I really am by all the nifty words I use, not to mention how I will sometimes throw in an apostrophe in place of a G. How you doin’? Ooh, you’re so cool Brewster!

Seriously though, recently someone asked me, “With all the horrible crap going on in the world, how do you still go on stage and act like nothing is wrong?” The easy answer is because that is what we are supposed to do. We have all heard the saying that the show must go on. Performers take that very seriously. I take it very seriously. Some people might not get that but for me, it’s a “just keep swimming” attitude that gets me through anything.

With the attacks all over the world and robberies and assaults right here in the gayborhood, it’s hard to feel safe. It reminds me a little of 9/11. It’s sad to say, but there is nothing like a tragedy to bring people together. Since the days after the Paris attacks, I have noticed the crowds at the clubs have been generally nicer to each other. I have noticed people looking out for one another more.

When 9/11 happened, this is what I remember: I woke up that morning late for work. I called my boss at Wherehouse Music to say I was going to be late, he said, “Gurrl, turn on your TV. We are about to close so just stay home.” I turned on the television and saw what everyone saw. I thought, this has to be for a movie or something, it’s not real. But it was real. Then my phone rang; it was my mother. I noticed on my cell that I had missed 10 calls from her (I turn off my ringer when I go to sleep). I answered and she just said thank God. She was worried that something was going to happen to the World Trade Center in Dallas which is just a few blocks from where I lived at the time. You know a mother’s brain always goes to the worst.

I sat in my apartment that whole day with my dog Dax. He comforted me more that day than any person could have. But that day, every channel on the television was the same thing, even PBS. They kept showing the same images over and over, to the point it wasn’t even shocking anymore. I hated thinking I was becoming desensitized to how horrible the situation was. So I did the only thing I could think to do, I went back to bed.

When I woke up later that evening, I called Stu at JR.’s and asked if we were going to be open. He said yes … and that the bar was busy. Celeste Martinez was doing her Tuesday night show there and I was her sidekick and helper for the show, so we went to work.

I remember that being a great night. Everyone was so nice to each other. Queens that were usually such complete cunts were hugging people. I remember my friend Bobby would randomly just bust out into tears, but I also remember how quickly those tears turned to laughter when I hugged him and told him to stop being a pussy. There was an air of calm and togetherness that night that I will never forget.

The next day was really weird to me. The weather was so nice. I went to get myself lunch at Taco Bell on Inwood. If you have ever tried to place an order at a drive-thru at a restaurant that close to the airport, you know that they usually stop you midsentence and say’ “Hold on, Plane! Can’t hear ya.” That day my order went uninterrupted. I realized how quiet it was — no planes overhead, very little traffic anywhere. It felt kind of apocalyptic. The quiet was creepy.

That night, I had a show so I spent the rest of that day doing hair and did some laundry, anything to keep me from turning on the television.

It was still on every single channel. I didn’t have cable at the time and channels 4, 5, 8, 11 and 13 were so depressing. So I went through my CD collection and I found my copy of Ellen DeGeneres Taste This. I would listen to that CD any time I felt sad and needed to be put into a better mood. I played it on loop while I got ready for the show. If you have never heard it, you should. It’s hilarious. It filled me with laughter and light and I made a conscious decision that I would take that energy to my show that night. My hope was that I would do for someone else what Ellen had done for me.

I did some of my old-school signature numbers in the show: Julie Brown’s “The Homecoming Queen Has Got a Gun,” and “I’ve Been So Mad Lately” by Butt Trumpet. I let loose and had fun and in turn the crowd had fun with me. There was a lot of laughter that night and again everyone was being so great to each other. The world outside our club was terrifying, but inside, we were there for each other when we needed it the most.

Watching the news this past few weeks has made me realize it might be time to bust out Taste This. The world could use a little Ellen love, light and laughter. Even if it has to come from me. If you are feeling down, go see a drag show. They are all tucking crazy!

And now I need to vent about something that has been driving me crazy. If you post a spoiler about a TV show or movie on Facebook, I want to punch you in the throat. Why would you be so mean? In this day of DVRs where very few people watch shows when they air, I find it annoying when someone posts about who died on The Walking Dead.

I wish I had the luxury of watching a show when it airs but I, like many people, work evenings. So when I casually scroll through my Facebook feed after one of my performances and see some Bitch named Caroline spill the tea about one of my favorite shows before I have a chance to watch it, I get pissed. Unfollow! Unfriend! Block!

I get that it’s Facebook but it says that we are friends, so why would you do that to a friend. You could have easily just said, “Oh my God! I can’t believe what happened on Game of Thrones.” Why do you have to give out details on what happens? You asshole! I’m talking to you, Justin!

So please, I beg you. Don’t be a Caroline or a Justin. Be a friend to the people that you have friended. Let me experience the same surprise you got to experience. So spoiler alert, if you spoil things for other people I will hate you till you die! Byesies! (Sorry if that came across as mean but that’s how I meant it!)

Remember to love more, bitch less and be fabulous. XOXO, Cassie Nova.

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This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition November 27, 2015.

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