7 ways social media has made you a sex addict

Posted on 16 Jun 2016 at 9:18am

Finger Pressing On Red Button With Porn Word On It And Blurred BTen years ago, when Facebook was in its infancy and iPhones were but a glimmer in Steve Jobs’ eyes, you had to work hard to be a perv. Now, fulfilling your friskiness is just a flick away, and that’s not exactly a good thing. Social media has taken over our lives, both personally and professionally, and the dark underbelly of our online world is as dank and seedy as a dimly lit bathhouse. As a result, you may very well be a sex addict; here are seven ways to find out.

1. DM on Twitter and Facebook has gotten you in trouble with your boo. What starts out as innocent “likes” and flirty comments on Facebook and Twitter soon evolves into a deep-see-diving expedition into the object of your burgeoning affection’s profile, left-swiping on the family and milestone photos but holding steady on the shirtless-vacay jackpot. Eventually one DMs the other in an attempt to push the boundaries of social-stranger etiquette — even though you know you shouldn’t – until a sordid relationship of sexts and sweet-nothings arises. Which is all well and good if it’s as innocuous as you say it is, but your partner doesn’t believe you when you get caught (as well he shouldn’t since you’re being dishonest), and therein lies your problem — likely one of many.

2. You spend way too much time on Grindr. Thanks to social media — and very specifically Grindr with regards to our gay community — most of us have developed not only a need but, more dastardly, an affinity for 375-feet-away validation and instant gratification. You open the app every 15 minutes to see if someone new has pinged you or, hopefully, that brick-bodied bro you’ve got your eye on has finally responded to your “Sup?” Friday and Saturday nights? Forget about it. What were once bastions of freedom and nightlife exploration have devolved into afternoon-to-evening-long sessions of sitting on the couch surfing headless thumbnails while Netflix plays in the background as you consistently turn down the so-sos and frequently get rejected or ignored by the more-sos. It’s cyclical, and you can’t quit it — until you hit it, that is (and you’re almost always compromising, which makes the whole situation even sadder), ultimately ushering in a brief respite before ending up back at square one a few hours later.

3. When theres a Grindr outage, you turn to Scruff. Gay Twitter loses it collective mind when Grindr experiences an outage, like it did recently — at least on the West Coast (and during the Palm Springs White Party, no less) — driving hordes of Grindr loyalists to other apps like Scruff to fulfill their insatiable desires. If you find yourself in a cold sweat, clamoring to connect nakedly with somebody — anybody! — nearby when the Grindr gods throw down the gauntlet, it’s probably high-time for reflection… and confession.

4. You’re really on Instagram for the man-butts. You’re kidding yourself if you think you’re on Instagram for the sweeping views and vistas of other people’s getaways, pics of kittens and your BFF’s brunch plate. Real talk, you’re there to scroll through the endless images of the buffed-out, swole-up models and meatheads you daydream about tossing you around like a rag doll. If you follow @seductionboys, @themuscleleague or @datbubblebutt, you might be a sex addict.

5. You bookmark YouPorn and Pornhub more than any other websites. We all have a handful of super-hot vids saved that are our go-tos. But if you’ve got them bookmarked on your phone or computer so you can have them at the ready whenever you’re ready — and they outnumber the more relevant and G-rated content you have stored — it’s time to pull up your pants, put the devices away and introduce yourself to the real world again.

6. We can all agree that Snapchat exists to share dick pix. A friend of mine asked me a few months ago if I’m on Snapchat. My response? No, because I’m not a 17-year-old kid trying to sext undercover. I’m grown, and when I send you my dick pic you get to keep it forever — because I’m confident like that. But I digress. My point that Snapchat is strictly for younger Millennials and high-schoolers to trade nudies with no cyber trail (even though that’s inaccurate) is proven by this appropriately worded statistic from research firm Martin-Wilbourn Partners: “Snapchat is now the third most popular social app among Millennials, with a 32.9 percent penetration on the demographic’s mobile phones, trailing only Instagram (43.1 percent) and Facebook (75.6 percent).”

7. You visit Tumbl for celeb nudes and homemade sex tapes. Does anybody even understand Tumblr? I don’t — except when I’m googling a celebrity’s junk or looking for amateur porn (because watching normal people do it as awkwardly as I do is comforting). That’s really all Tumblr is good for. Anybody who tries to tell you differently is either a liar or a 13-year-old girl, or probably both.

— Mikey Rox

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PULSE: Melissa Etheridge responds to Orlando massacre with music

Posted on 15 Jun 2016 at 3:04pm

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Lesbian singer/songwriter Melissa Etheridge has written a new song, “Pulse,” in response to the shooting at the Orlando gay nightclub Pulse early Sunday morning, June 12, Rolling Stone reports.

The song begins with the lyrics, “Everybody’s got a pain inside/Imaginary wounds they fight to hide/How can I hate them, when everybody’s got a pulse?” The refrain calls for unity in the fight against hate: I am human; I am love/And my heart beats with my blood/Love will always win/Underneath the skin, everybody’s got a pulse.”

“I’m dealing with it the way I deal, which is, I wrote a song,” Etheridge told Rolling Stone. “I just sat here, and I just started writing a song… That’s how I first started to cope … . I feel called to speak; to do what musicians do. We’ve been the town criers for hundreds of years. We’re mirrors of society. We want to try to make sense. We want to try to heal. We want to bring some meaning, some purpose. We also want to put it down forever in history. That’s how I’m coping.”

Etheridge went into the studio Monday, June 13, with Jerry Wonda to record the new song, which she named after the nightclub where the shooting happened because “there’s just something very poetic and very meaningful about the name,” she told Rolling Stone. “You just start thinking about your own pulse. It’s the way I’ve always felt about the gay movement, the gay issue. Here we are — people who are loving; we are fighting for who we want to love.”

Etheridge said the song will be available to purchase soon, and that proceeds will be donated to an LGBT charity.

Listen to “Pulse” here.

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He Ain’t Heavy, He’s My Brother: Chorale comforts the community

Posted on 15 Jun 2016 at 11:10am
Denise Lee

Denise Lee performs in the Songs for Healing concert with Turtle Creek Chorale on Tuesday night at Cathedral of Hope.

Turtle Creek Chorale Artistic Director Sean Baugh woke up on Monday morning at 5:30 a.m. and knew he needed to do something in response to the Orlando attacks. So he started sending emails. One after another, members of the Chorale responded, saying they would participate.

Baugh quickly pulled together a program — Songs for Healing. Denise Lee said she’d be there with him. Chris Chism said he’d do a solo. Jodi Crawford Wright agreed to reprise “I Love You More,” the mother’s song from Tyler’s Suite, the piece commissioned by the Chorale about the death of Tyler Clementi. Members of Resounding Harmony and of the CoH choir also stepped up to participate.

Cathedral of Hope opened its doors on Tuesday night, June 14, for the community to come and grieve. The Dallas Police Department responded with 60 officers swarming the campus, quietly but visibly making their presence known. DPD Chief David Brown and his officers received their own standing ovation.

Had he had time, Baugh said he would have pulled together photos from news reports of survivors carrying gunshot victims out of Pulse and running with them down the street to the nearby hospital. Even without the visual, the image was clear as they sang, “He Ain’t Heavy, He’s My Brother.”

The concert streamed through KERA and WFAA to more than 28,000 people. About 2,000 people filled the church and several hundred more packed the Interfaith Peace Chapel to watch on monitors. Passing a plate raised $15,000 to help cover expenses for the Orlando victim’s families and medical expenses for the survivors.

The Rev. Neil Cazares-Thomas reminded those attending that the men’s choral movement began in San Francisco the night Harvey Milk was shot when a group of men gathered and began to sing.

The concert itself was a testament to the brilliance of the Turtle Creek Chorale. Baugh pulled several songs from last week’s Heartstrings concert but others were from more distant concerts. Without a rehearsal, the performance came off without an apparent glitch. One song after another received a well-deserved standing ovation. Throughout the concert, Chorale members read names of the dead. The crowd left the church still stunned by the massacre but comforted as the community came together.

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WATCH: Brooke Candy video ‘Nasty’

Posted on 15 Jun 2016 at 8:56am

Described as a cross between John Waters, a Bugs Bunny cartoon and Pam and Tommy’s sex tape, this is the latest funky video from Brooke Candy.

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Chorale to hold free ‘healing’ concert Tuesday at COH

Posted on 13 Jun 2016 at 11:40am

5-Sean-Baugh-TCC-by-HHenley-copyOn Saturday night, the Turtle Creek Chorale thought it had held its final concert of the season. It was the third consecutive presentation of Heartstrings, which celebrated love (and included nightly weddings of actual same-sex couples).

But the chorale’s work is not quite done — and for all the wrong reasons.

Following the tragedy in Orlando, TCC artistic director Sean Baugh has announced he will lead members of Dallas’ gay men’s chorus in a free concert Tuesday night. Songs for Healing will be a tribute and memorial “to help bring hope and healing in response to the deadliest mass shooting ever to occur.”

“This irrational and cruel act of terrorism strikes deeply at the very core of our community,” Baugh said. “This impact is horrible throughout our city, our state and our world. We must do what we do best — heal with the power of song — to blunt this pathetic act.”

The concert will include songs recently performed for Heartstrings, as well as a preview of some planned for the GALA Choruses Festival to be held in Denver in July.

It will take place in the sanctuary of the Cathedral of Hope, 5910 Cedar Springs Road, starting at 7 p.m. Tuesday. Admission is free.

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And the Tony Award goes to…

Posted on 13 Jun 2016 at 12:17am

LMMIt was a somber night to be presenting entertainment awards but the Tonys managed to pull it off, with a respectful opening invocation and with speeches peppered throughout that called for unity, diversity, tolerance and even sanity in light of the horrific massacre in Orlando. And as if guided by providence, the big winner of the night, as expected, was a testament to scrappy American wherewithal — the hip-hop historical tour de force Hamilton, which took 11 total awards, including best musical.

It was unlikely the show would break the record for wins — 12, held by The Producers — even with its record-setting 16 nominations, in part because it was so often in competition for itself. Lin-Manuel Miranda, the show’s creator, had to make due with two wins (score and book of a musical) out of three nominations — he lost best leading actor to Leslie Odom Jr. … for Hamilton. The show also took home trophies for best featured actor (Daveed Diggs), featured actress (Renee Elise Goldsberry), director of a musical, orchestrations, choreography, costume design for a musical and lighting design for a musical. It only outright lost in two categories — scenic design of a musical (which won She Loves Me its only Tony) and best actress in a musical, which went to Cynthia Erivo as Celie in the new production of The Color Purple, which also best best musical revival.

In the play category, the night’s big winner was out producer Scott Rudin, who was lead producer on both best play winner The Humans (which also won for best featured actor Reed Birney, best featured actress Jayne Houdyshell, and best scenic design of a play ) and best revival of a play winner A View from the Bridge, which also took best director of a play honors. Leading actress in a play went to Jessica Lange for Long Day’s Journey into Night, which also won for lighting design of a play. Best actor in a play was four-timer Frank Langella in The Father, and Eclipsed won its only award for best costume design for a play.

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WATCH: Documentary about gay love in Iraq airs Monday on Logo

Posted on 12 Jun 2016 at 12:12pm

BtooNayyef2It’s gay Pride month — our commemorative issue comes out next Friday, so look for it on newsstands and online — and the Logo network is showing documentaries focused on gay issues. Up this Monday: Out of Iraq: A Love Story. The film documents the efforts of an Iraqi-born translator for the American military who meets and falls in love with an Iraqi soldier, and when circumstances force them apart, his efforts to rescue his love from the homophobic regime. The politically-charged documentary airs June 13 at 8 p.m. Here’s a sneak peek.

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FIRST LOOK: ilume’s new Cedar Grove restaurant

Posted on 11 Jun 2016 at 10:05am

IMG_3137Dish has been gone since the winter, and now,  just as summer is about to officially begin, the space at the ilume is about to reopen. Cedar Grove is the reimagined version by Dish owner Tim McEneny. Design-wise, McEneny has gone for an urban forest of custom-made abstract tree branches. They frame the largely communal seating of the space, but also divide it to make an intimate dinner for two work as well as big gathering of friends. “It’s very European,” McEneny told me during a personal tour. The seating has also increased by about 50, allowing 212 diners and an additional 20 at the bar.

It’s not just the atmospherics that got an overhaul. The menu was created by executive chef Taylor Kearney to appeal broadly to the community.

“Frankly, Dish was too powerful for the neighborhood,” McEneny explains. “It was good for special occasions or once a week, but we want people to stop by on their way out for the night, grab a drink and quick bite and still have money for the rest of the evening.” For instance, every day will offer a 2/4/6 drink menu — some draft beers on tap for $2, a selection of well drinks for $4 and some premiums for $6.

Only a few food items are over $20, McEneny said. “There are 22 items called ‘snacks,’ which is a sharing section. Then there’s the ‘bread and bun’ — that’s burgers and sandwiches, but also pizzas. Then what we call large dishes. And it’s mostly food we grew up with.”

The popular drag brunch will be back eventually… probably. “I’d say yes, but not right away,” McEneny said. “We’re still working out things, and it will be very hot in July and August, but I expected we will bring it back right after Pride” in September, he said.

Nevertheless, fans will still recognize a lot of things. The bar hasn’t actually moved, although they extended the front door all the way to the property line so it feels more centered. And the bathrooms are — as they have always been — unisex: One door, different stalls.

“We’ve done this for six years,” McEnery said. “My daughter goes to the University of North Carolina. I’ve said, ‘Let me show the governor there how it’s done.'”

Service will begin at 3 p.m. on Tuesday and be open seven says a week (dinner starts at 4 p.m.). Cedar Grove will also be open for brunch Saturday and Sunday, from 10 a.m.–4 p.m.

Check of some first look photos below, and look for more here next week.

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Cocktail Friday: Italrish Amaretto

Posted on 10 Jun 2016 at 1:43pm

ItalrishLots of cocktail recipes are what you have to call “modern” — mixologist-driven gastronomic inventions that stimulate the palate (and the mind) with new-fangled ingredients and newish liquors. Well, how about something that sounds just basically old-school and simple? That’s what this twofer says to us, which we’re calling Italrish Amaretto. It’s a the perfect concoction for Father’s Day (June 19).

1.25 oz. Irish whiskey, such as Tullamore Dew.

3/4 oz. Amaretto di Saranno almond liqueur.

Making it: Fill a glass 2/3rds full of ice. Add amaretto, then add whiskey. Stir until chilled, and strain into a rocks glass.

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WATCH: Dallas actors create a ‘Hamilton’ video that deserves to go viral

Posted on 10 Jun 2016 at 1:22pm

Screen shot 2016-06-10 at 1.04.02 PMOn Sunday night, Hamilton — the amazing, hip-hop musical tour of Colonial history — is primed to all but sweep the Tony Awards. Why the surge? Because it’s often years between truly culturally-changing musicals (the last was probably The Book of Mormon), and this one has tons of support. People love it. Love it. It can be scary. (Theater queens are scary anyway.)

So Dallas theater folks — among them Rob McCollum, Kristin McCollum, Jessica Cavanagh, Gregory Lush and many more — decided to offer some medical help for your Hamilton addiction… and it requires you put your tongue firmly in cheek. “Hamilaria” is the 3-minute video, a purported commercial for a treatment center (the made-up Weehawken Institute) that treats those suffering from #Hamilaria, the condition of constantly finishing sentences with lyrics from the original cast recording. Barely 24 hours since it came on YouTube, it’s already been retweeted by Hamilton creator Lin-Manuel Miranda… and you might wanna get on the ground floor and help it go viral. (Side effects may include spontaneous rapping, bursts of laughter and throwing signs with your fingers.) Watch it once, and you’ll be back… and if you don’t get that reference… well, you soon will…

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