MARTHA, MARTHA, MARTHA! | Public Radio’s doyenne of word originals, Martha Barnette, swoops into Dallas for a live show of ‘A Way with Words’ quicker than a duck on a junebug. (Ask her what it means.)

RICH LOPEZ  | Contributing Writer
getrichindallas@gmail.com

We applaud when someone like NBA player Jason Collins comes out of the closet. But why was he in the closet anyway? No, not metaphorically, but really. Is “the closet” some arbitrary term, or did it hold certain significance? Why not the basement or the trunk?

Questions such as these are no big deal for Grant Barrett and Martha Barnette, who co-host the public radio show A Way With Words (airing on KERA Fridays at 1 p.m., Sundays at 2 p.m.). The wordsmiths will come to Dallas for a live show at the Lakewood Theater on Thursday, benefiting (natch) The Aberg Center for Literacy. But before they got here, we sought from Barnette, who is lesbian, some insights about how queer colloquialisms (colloqueerisms? queerloquialisms?) have entered the public lexicon. And as a lover of words (formal term: logophile) Barnette enjoys explaining just how LGBT culture is likely influencing today’s language.

“We certainly see gay slang bubbling up and sliding over,” she says. “‘In the closet’ arose around the late ’60s and early ’70s, but the idea of coming out has been around for hundreds of years. And now, everyone uses it as a type of reveal:

‘I came out of the closet as a fan of Honey Boo Boo!’”

Barnette relishes in the amorphous nature of English as it compares to other languages. If it were a Scruff profile, it would proudly proclaim itself “versatile.”

“I would suspect that the case is, as society gets exposed to us and then our language, more people adopt [the terminology]. That happens across the board,” Barnette says. “That’s the great strength of the English language: its diversity. Unlike others, English is open and embracing. It’s like the person at the table asking in French or Italian, ‘Are you gonna eat that?’”

Barnette is excited by her Dallas appearance, and says she and Barrett can always tell when the show is on the air in North Texas by the sheer volume of calls they receive. She’s not just blowing smoke: Tune in or download any episode and D/FW gets a fair representation of fans calling to figure out that weird thing grandma always said or where certain foods get their name.

“We have experienced so much love from you guys,” she says. “You all have such an intellectual curiosity.”

She hopes people will bring that to the event. The night will bring awareness to the Aberg Center’s mission to provide adult education and family literacy programming to decrease the near half-million Dallasites who lack a high school education and English fluency.

“It’s a perfect fit,” says Teri Walker, the Aberg Center’s executive director. “Martha and Grant and Aberg Center share an understanding of how language creates and reflects culture. We’re grateful to them for coming to Dallas in support of literacy.”

KERA’s Think  host Krys Boyd will moderate, including the partaking of quizzes and a Q&A consistent with the show’s affable, insightful nature. Perhaps even the gays can hit up Barnette for some homo-definitions and origins — like, why is “Mary” such a popular name to throw around.

“I think that’s very interesting,” Barnette admits. “I’ve heard ‘Blanche,’ also. Use of feminine names has been around — ‘Miss Nancy’ goes back to the 1820s. And ‘Nelly’ was derived when people would use ‘Nervous’ or ‘Nice Nelly.’ There’s even a Broadway show now with Nathan Lane called The Nance where he plays that kind of character.”

Barnette does say lesbians don’t have an equivalent: “There are the ‘U-Haul’ types or ‘bois’, but no tradition that I’m aware of,” she says.

While Barnette described herself as “pretty gay” during our interview, she followed it up with an email asking if I was familiar with the term “Quiltbag.” (Nope.)

Pointing to a link to QueerDictionary on Tumblr, I find “Quiltbag” is an acronym for “Queer/Questioning, Undecided, Intersex, Lesbian, Transgender/Transsexual, Bisexual, Allied/Asexual, Gay/Genderqueer.”

“I’d say I fall somewhere on that continuum,” she says. “I’m wondering if that will cross over into the mainstream.”

Here’s hoping.

This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition May 10, 2013.

Mikey Nguyen by Arnold Wayne Jones

SEXIEST BARTENDER
Mikey Nguyen, TMC: The Mining Company
3903 Cedar Springs Road
Open daily until 2 a.m.
Caven.com

As everyone knows, nothing is sexier than a guy who doesn’t think he’s sexy. So when Mikey Nguyen learned he has been voted Dallas’ sexiest bartender, his initial reaction was something like, “Are you sure they got the right guy?” But it’s not bulging biceps or bouncing pecs that make Mikey so popular on weekends at TMC: The Mining Company, after four years at Station 4; it’s that disarming smile and sweet personality that exudes friendly self-effacement. And it probably has something to do with his mixing skills, like the rainbow shot that is a signature twist on the blue Hawaiian. When he pours, he reigns.

— Arnold Wayne Jones

Brandon Moses

TOP CLUB DJ
Brandon Moses

We first got to know DJ Brandon Moses at his regular gigs at the Tin Room and the Drama Room, but when he went the exclusive route, well, he blew up. Now the Top Hat DJ is the go-to mixmaster for high-profile events, such as the Red Party, Lambda Legal’s White Party, Toast to Life and the Black Tie Dinner After Party.
Oh, and he just so happened to get invited back as a headliner for this year’s Purple Party in April. Let’s face it: When you’re dancing the night away, it never hurts to look over and see cute-as-a-button Moses at the turntable. And if you ever want to have him all to yourself at home, well, you can — via his Podcast at TheDanceCommandment.Podomatic.com. Wait … what were you thinking?

— Rich Lopez

Dancers at BJ’s NXS! by Chuck Marcelo

TOP DALLAS CLUB
FRIENDLIEST BAR STAFF
The Round-Up Saloon
3912 Cedar Springs Road
Open Daily 8 p.m.-2 a.m.
214-522-9611
RoundUpSaloon.com

TOP FORT WORTH CLUB
Rainbow Lounge
651 South Jennings Ave., Fort Worth
Open daily until 2 a.m.
817-870-2466
Facebook.com/RainbowLounge

TOP LADIES NIGHT OUT
Sue Ellen’s
3014 Throckmorton St.
Open daily until 2 a.m.
After-hours dancing until 4 a.m.
214-559-0707
Caven.com

TOP KARAOKE HOST
Robert Olivas
Freelance host, Opus 7 Entertainment

TOPS CENTRAL
The Dallas Eagle
5740 Maple Ave.
Open Sunday­–Thursday until 2 a.m., Friday–Saturday until 4 a.m.
214-357-4375
DallasEagle.com

BOTTOMS CENTRAL
Station 4
3911 Cedar Springs Road
Open Wednesday-Sunday until 2 a.m.
After-hours dancing until 4 a.m.
214-526-7171
Caven.com

TOP THEME NIGHT
Panoptikon: Disco v. Retro
Monthly party at 3025 Main St.
PanoptikonDallas.com

TOP BEER BUST
The Hidden Door
5025 Bowser Ave.
Open daily till 2 a.m.
214-526-0620
HiddenDoor-Dallas.com

TOP DRINK DEALS
The Dallas Eagle
5740 Maple Ave.
Open Sunday­–Thursday until 2 a.m.,
Friday–Saturday until 4 a.m.
214-357-4375
DallasEagle.com

DICK DANCER DESTINATION
BJ’s NXS! (pictured above)
3215 N. Fitzhugh Ave.
214-526-9510
BJsNXS.com

HOTTEST HOOKUP SITE
Grindr

This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition March 22, 2013.

ARNOLD WAYNE JONES  | Life+Style Editor
jones@dallasvoice.com

SWITCHBOARDS NOW OPEN | Gilliland commandeers the mic for two days of the KERA pledge drive, and he’s determined to entertain while begging for dollars. (Arnold Wayne Jones/Dallas Voice)

Although  Rawlins Gilliland would never describe himself as a mad prophet of the airwaves, he does have at least one thing in common with Howard Beale from Network: He’s mad as hell, and he’s not gonna take it anymore.

As a long-time contributor — and, of course, devoted listener — to KERA 90.1 FM, the local NPR affiliate, Gilliland is all-too-familiar with the infamous pledge drives that have become long, intrusive and tedious.

He understands why people tend to tune out during the 240 days of fundraising each year. (Actual figure may be less; it just feels that way.)

“Most people would rather have their teeth cleaned by a bipolar dentist who reeked of boxed chardonnay” than endure another pledge drive, he says. So, as the fall campaign loomed — it’s scheduled to last up to 14 days, starting Oct. 14 — Gilliland decided to take action. While he did not want to insult his colleagues for their efforts, he nevertheless told KERA’s management they needed to make the pledge drive better. Lots better. And he wasn’t shy about saying he was the man who could do it.

He has facts on his side. Gilliland’s droll commentaries, often with a sassy gay twist, have engaged listeners for years. He has volunteered to host countless hours on the pledge drive, and his segments always are among the most lively and effective at getting calls in. “Begone the endless droning!” he seems to say. “Let’s bring in some fun!”

“They were very enthusiastic,” he says of KERA’s reaction to the proposal — so much so, they asked if he would consider two dates.

“Everything I’ve ever done well in my life is because someone told me they liked the idea and gave me to freedom to do what I needed to,” Gilliland says. “A fresh idea has a very short shelf-life. It’s only a really good idea when it’s still new.”

Toward that end, Gilliland may be the first person since Jerry Lewis to turn a telethon (or radiothon) into an entertainment event. On Tuesday, Oct. 18 and again on Monday, Oct. 24, he’s programming virtually the entire day of fundraising from 9 a.m. to 7 p.m., bringing in special guest co-hosts from across the community to share in the duties.

He insisted that all his co-hosts meet three criteria: They had to be glib, multifaceted and devoted listeners of KERA. “All of these people are people I really know,” he says.

Among the local celebs set to share the air during Gilliland’s two day begathon: Former city councilwoman and current Arts District maven Veletta Lill (Oct. 18, 3–4 p.m.), gay publicist John Shore (Oct. 18. 4–5 p.m.), transgender restaurateur Monica Greene (Oct. 24, 9–10 a.m.) and Dallas Market Center V.P. and DIFFA volunteer Alden Clanahan (Oct. 24, 11 a.m.–noon). One of his guests will be Mary McDermott Cook, whose father founded Texas Instruments. Gilliland met her after he made a radical promise during the spring membership drive: Make a pledge and I will take you out for cocktails and dinner.

“One person called in because he said, ‘You had some skin in the game.’ I said, ‘Here’s what I’ll do.’ People respond to that.”

It’s that kind of response Gilliland hopes his experiment will yield. “I call it a sort of intervention to minimize the apocalypse of the pledge drive,” he says.
To pledge — please — and end the drive early, call 888-694-6931 or visit KERA.org.

This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition October 14, 2011.

ON AIR  |  Chase Brooks’ ‘Reckless After Dark’ is the only show on Fish Bowl Network that brings a gay voice to the Internet air waves.

Local 19-year-old radio jock Chase Brooks is making his play to become the gay Howard Stern

RICH LOPEZ  |  Staff Writer
lopez@dallasvoice.com

Never underestimate the power of youth — especially when backed by a microphone.

Chase Brooks proves that in spades. At 19, the Weatherford native is already a published author … and that’s not even his primary interest. Brooks isn’t going to wait for his moment to come, he’s creating it with his second (yes, second) radio talk show, Reckless After Dark.

“I’m the type of personality that likes controversy. I’ll play with the line but, you know, I may not cross it,” he says.

Brooks mixes the charm of youth with eagerness and expectation in his voice, but he also has an unexpected savvy. He knows the right answers to give without sounding fake, but his wide-eyed outlook quickly reminds listeners that he’s no veteran with pre-packaged ideas and sound bites. Radio has become Brooks’ passion, born out of a sort of happy accident.

“This just kinda fell into my lap,” he says. “After my last book came out, I was interviewed on the radio and I fell in love with the surroundings. That was on QNation, this all-gay online radio network and then I heard they were looking for new shows.”

Let’s back up a second.

Brooks self-published his first novel, Hello, My Love, while still a senior at Weatherford High School. Soon after his final semester, he published the sequel, Hello, My Love 2: First Love Deserves a Second Chance — that hit the streets the day of his graduation ceremony. He calls the two books “young adult romantic comedies geared toward straight readers,” but his third book, the nonfiction compendium Reckless, takes on a darker tone dealing with gay issues.

“The book is compilation of essays,” he says. “I came through a lot of drama with relationships and family and what I learned from each one. I think the book really says ‘It does get better.’”

He debuted Reckless After Dark on QNation, but last January, he jumped his show over to the Fish Bowl Network, started by local radio veteran Sammi G. There, Brooks could take advantage of the learning process because the network operated more as a radio station. Before long, he was doing it all out of his laptop and prerecording shows.

The diversity of the lineup is also intriguing. According to its web site, the network airs 67 shows; of those, Reckless is its only LGBT program.

“We say the show is straight-friendly but gay-friendlier,” Brooks laughs. “We are the wackiest show out there on the network and we’ll talk about anything from sex to stuff going on in community and we get a lot of great guests. A lot of people seem to enjoy listening to us.”

For radio shows, you almost expect to hear the term “wacky” bandied about endlessly, and Reckless After Dark is no exception. Brooks proudly recounts tales of radio bits involving monster dildos, phone sex and guys calling in only to get punk’d on the air — college humor-type stuff. But where Brooks shines the most is his ability to snag high-profile guests. For an online gay radio show hosted by a teenager, Brooks’ guests have included the likes of A List-er Reichen Lehmkuhl, Tupperware drag queen Dixie Longate, activist icon Judy Shepard and queermedian fave Margaret Cho — not too shabby for a team of youngsters who include publicist Malcolm Lewis and co-hosts Auntie J and Cat Michaels.

Brooks attributes the appeal of his show to such guests to his basic professionalism and transparency — guests know full on what they are getting into.

“I think a lot of them say yes because I give them rundown of what the show is and they love that,” he says. “They seem to like the ‘out there’ shows because in online radio you can do a lot more than on regular AM-FM stations. That’s liberating for them and me. Plus, I think it benefits their careers.”

Where Reckless is inherently silly with fun, gay banter frequent with the guests, Brooks is serious about what he’s created and has the wherewithal to envision a bigger picture — hence his move to Fish Bowl.

“Moving there was going to be a greater opportunity for the show because the network isn’t all gay,” he says. “In that environment, you don’t stand out. Fish Bowl has all types of shows but we’re the only gay one. I think that’s an honor and challenge to draw people in. They may not all agree with the lifestyle, but maybe I can educate or warm them up to the idea of being an ally.”

For Sammi G., Brooks brought the perfect opportunity to expand Fish Bowl’s already diverse roster. “He brings gay issues to the forefront here,” she says, “and he’s got all the characteristics to be great. Age wasn’t an issue, because I was 17 when I started in radio 30 years ago.”

Brooks’ dream is to rise to the Kidd Kraddick/Howard Stern level of influence, but specifically for the gay community. There isn’t that one predominantly gay radio variety show with that gay host with that major presence, especially in FM or AM (although, gays may not really listen to AM for anything). Whether that eventually happens, he’s intent on making his impression — whether to his usual local 20something gay audience or to fans across the sea.

“The listeners definitely motivate me and knowing that I made a difference or even laugh is a good feeling,” he says. “If opportunities came up in regular radio, I’d consider it, but I love how anyone from anywhere can listen to me now. I’ve heard from fans in Canada and Greece. This isn’t my job, this is my lifestyle, my passion. I would do this for free if I had to.”

Reckless After Dark streams Thursdays, 5–7 p.m. on FishBowlRadioNetwork.com.

This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition Jan. 14, 2011

Coping with a crush on radio’s most disarming intellectual

PUTTING A FACE TO THE VOICE | Public Radio sex object Ira Glass will appear through the DMA’s Arts & Letters Live series.

IRA GLASS
Eisemann Center,
2351 Performance Drive,
Richardson. June 12 at 7:30 p.m. $25–$45.
DallasMuseumofArt.org

I don’t mind saying it: Like all NPR junkie pseudo-intellectuals, I have a crush on Ira Glass.

If you already know who he is, you understand completely. If you don’t know, you’re missing out.

Glass, who hosts and created This American Life (which airs on 90.1 KERA weekends) is an enigmatic figure along the fringe of pop culture. I have no idea whether he’s gay; frankly, I don’t want to know. The fantasy sustains me. All I know is, he has a puckish sense of whimsy masking (or sometime revealing) his intense intelligence; his small-L liberalism seems off-handedly natural. (He seems unflappable that someone may be gay or a collector of antique kitten sculptures or into duck hunting or is a gay duck hunter who collects kitten sculptures. It’s all good.)

Glass cultivated that mysterious appeal, intentionally or not, with his early resistance when This American Life debuted to having his photo taken and by revealing precious little about himself. What does this man look like? Is he available? If he is available, does he play on my team? Ira Glass was my secret lover, a man I didn’t know personally, had never seen, but wanted to be with. He seduced me with his words alone. (When his series went to cable, he was forced to give a face to the voice.)

That said, it would be difficult to describe his voice and make it sound appealing; in many ways, it isn’t. There’s nothing dulcet about those vowels or charming about his twang. He speaks in staccato syllables with that pinched, nasally Mid-Atlantic whine that just screams, "I was in Skull and Bones." Or more precisely, "I wasn’t myself in Skull and Bones, but my dad was. Who does that anymore?" Less Buckley-New England, more Hamptons-on-holidays. He’s not pretentious, but you know he could be if he wanted to. That’s part of the charm.

I assume Ira — I can call you Ira, can’t I? — is unaware of my particular fascination with him, but he must be aware of the many, many gay men, straight women and, I am guessing, straight men who have carried on emotional affairs with him over the wireless all these years. On behalf of all of us, I say, "Welcome to Dallas. Can I buy you a drink?"

This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition June 11, 2010.

Veteran radio personality Rick Vanderslice returns to the broadcast airwaves with a new young partner and the same old passions

ON THE AIR
THE RICK & R.J. RADIO SHOW airs locally on 1360 AM Sundays, 11 a.m.–1 p.m. and streams on RationalRadio.org.

It may be no accident that The Rick & R.J. Radio Show airs at 11 a.m. on Sundays — a traditional time in the U.S. for church services that provide you with comfort at the end of a long week, and strength to continue for another. Because for Rick Vanderslice and R.J. Jackson, the liberal-minded gay hosts of the program, their show is a sermon of sorts, both about looking back on the week that was and proselytizing about how to make the future better.

"I really like talk radio," says Vanderslice, a 30-year veteran on the radio scene. "I like conversation; I like live experiences. Jack Jett [whose show follows his] comes from performance art and he takes cues from an audience to know where he’s going. I wish we had audiences we could see, but radio is really theater of the imagination."

It doesn’t take a lot of imagination to parse Vanderslice’s point of view. He’s old school progressive, an aging hippy (he used to be in a folk band) who cut his teeth on radio because "I didn’t know I couldn’t do it." He floated between being a morning DJ on a soft rock station to hosting The Evening Talk Show on KERA, but never got to do exactly what he drove him.

"I was a morning drive personality, but I love to talk about healthcare policy or gay rights. At public radio, I did not get to be an opinion person. But politics is not a dirty word, though it has been dirtied. We let the elite class run things, whereas I just want to engage people to think rationally. We are not thinking rationally but emotionally. That’s why we vote for people like Sarah Palin."

HE SAID, HE SAID | Vanderslice, left, debates with his young co-host R.J. Jackson, right, on ‘The Rick and R.J. Radio Show,’ airing Sundays on 1360 AM. (Arnold Wayne Jones/Dallas Voice)

You just know it won’t take too long before Vanderslice gets around to Palin.

But if he sounds slightly like the Angry Young Man grown older and crotchetier, he insists he’s not. He uses his new radio program, in fact, to explore new avenues.

Vanderslice left KERA in 2002, and began doing a weekly Podcast from Buli Café. Then this spring, Jack Bishop, the station manager at Rational Radio and an old friend of Vanderslice, asked if he would do a weekend show.

"I said, "How can I make it different?’ R.J. had been a regular member of my Vanderslice Salon, and it seemed to fit. He’s young and not afraid of debate or disagreeing with me," Vanderslice says.

For his part, co-host R.J. Jackson is less inclined to sound doctrinaire about politics. Jackson arrives in the studio — about 30 seconds before going on air — in a white button-down with floral tie, his topcoat flouncing like a cape, unlit cigarette dangling between his fingers. He looks all of 17 years old (he’s 28); he might be Harry Potter without his wand, preparing to lecture the Muggles about their world with cynical incisiveness. He’s sharp and witty, and more than holds his own against his more experienced old-dog airwave mate.

"It’s difficult to pigeonhole his generation," Vanderslice concedes. "He’s not a political person. I don’t think most people his age give a twit about that. The Obama election was an emotional thing for them, but they are not as idealistic as my ’60s generation. Because they are presented with all the platforms to see the chaos of the world, they are skeptical of people who are sure of the solutions. But some of his skepticism is healthy for me."

The dynamic has fed the dialogue and helped Vanderslice shape his views.

"I sometimes change my beliefs on air. R.J. comes up with a point I might not have considered. I like sometimes to say, ‘I give up, you’re right.’ You’re not there to be right; the main thing is to entertain people."

Not that it’s all about entertainment for Vanderslice. His curiosity, and his opinionated way of conveying some of his passions, are genuine. He proudly identifies himself a liberal (although, he smirks, "somebody took a vote and we’re supposed to call it progressive radio"), though he admits to frustration with labels. Vanderslice lived in Amsterdam for a while, and came to believe socialized medicine shouldn’t be such a divisive political issue.

"Cradle-to-grave healthcare is a liberal idea, but it should be a conservative idea. If you want to be a rich hyper-capitalist, having all the basic needs of a people met is a better environment," he opines. "Consideration usually leads to experimentation. Trying something out should never be held up as a negative. The open marketplace of ideas you’d think conservatives would rally around. That is their Achilles heel: The Palin wing of the Republican Party doesn’t want to have to defend their beliefs."

What Vanderslice calls the "bumper sticker political class" of Palin and friends is what most offends him; he wants people to be engaged, and wants his show to do it — even if it’s at his expense.

"I’m the old fart with Queer Liberaction, either Svengali pulling strings or a confirmed pedophile. I don’t give a shit. I invite people to call me a son of a bitch if I have to," he says. Just so long as people respond.

"The price of apathy is to be ruled by evil men," Vanderslice likes to quote. And he’s not yet ready to concede the evil men have won.

RADIO ILUME BEGINS

The Jack E Jett Show, which airs weekends on 1360 AM is movin’ on up … to Uptown. For the month of December, the talk show has created Radio ilume, which will air live from the new ilume mixed-used development along Cedar Springs.

This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition December 11, 2009.

After surviving quadruple bypass surgery and a stroke, Jack E. Jett, Dallas’ weirdest media star, returns to radio

GETTING SOMETHING OFF HIS CHEST: Could Jack E. Jett’s new favorite bar be… Zippers?

THE RETURN OF THE KING
"The Jack E. Jett Show"
return June 20 and 21,
1–3 p.m. on 1360 AM and
streaming on RationalRadio.org.
His "Free Speech Night"
returns to Buzz Brews,
4334 Lemmon Ave.
on June 30 at 8 p.m.

You can call Jack E. Jett many things — most of which he has happily called himself — but he balks at one term in particular.

"The word ‘broadcaster’ sounds far more professional than I am worthy of," he says. In 2000, he discovered that "making an ass of myself via the media was cathartic," and began hosting a quirky chat show on local cable access.

That led to bigger and better things: Co-hosting duties when Q Network was launched in 2004, and series airing across the U.S. and Canada. Then last September, he began "The Jack E. Jett Show" on 1360 AM and streamed on RationalRadio.org, one of the last jobs he ever thought he’d get here.

"It is not easy to find a radio gig in a city where one has been so critical of the local media," he says.

But he has his champions. Jett has been darlinged by the likes of the Go-Go’s frontgal Belinda Carlisle (he was once her assistant and neighbor) and Sandra Bernhard; Olympic diving champ Greg Louganis will soon start as a weekly guest.

Yet his devotion to personal peculiarity has kept him very outré. Unlike David Letterman, who turned his Midwest curmudgeonliness into a comic franchise, Jett has remained largely inscrutable: a whimsically opaque genius man-child, like an idiot savant whose special talent is not getting the joke while always making sure the joke is on you.

That persona — equal parts ADHD and a droll, whip-smart ironic sensibility, and from experience I can assure you, completely authentic — hasn’t diminished. But it has been missing from the airwaves and Internet streams since early last month. That’s when Jett checked himself into the hospital for quintuple bypass heart surgery (the medic saved him a leg vein by accomplishing everything with a mere quadruple procedure). New episodes of his freshman weekend radio were yanked until Jett was well enough to return.

And that’s this weekend.

Jett blames himself for failing to read the signs that led to his heart condition.

"I had gained so much weight in my stomach that I looked like Octo-Dad without the Botox," he says. Over a year, he gained 50 pounds "for no other reason than I just became a fucking pig. As someone who, in my youth, stayed in shape for the sake of my ego, it never occurred to me to get in shape for the sake of my life."

Looking back, he’s amazed at the power of denial. He ignored the shortness of breath and chest pains after the briefest of walks or exertions. The discomfort increased on a daily basis. Yet he would never let the fear or reality set in enough to be concerned. Despite his father and brother having had open-heart surgery, "I still had this attitude that I was immune to it. I had bilateral hip replacement back in 2000 and have been HIV-positive since 1989, so I thought I was pretty butch when it came to shit like this."

With characteristic snarkiness, he laughs now at the procedure. "The surgeon sawed open my chest and sliced up my legs and got jiggy with my heart valves —and all this without a single hit of poppers," he says. "Somehow is it necessary for [healthcare workers] to talk to patients like they are children. It was a bit much to be asked about how much I had wee-wee’d or tinkled, or about my ‘BMs’ as opposed to bowel movements. The nurses seemed overly fixated on watersports."

But the truth is, the recovery has been a quantum measure more difficult than Jett had predicted.

"This was far more major than I bargained for," Jett admits. He had decided to "get it over with quick," but wonders now if he shouldn’t have thought his decision through more.

"I wish I had studied the pros and cons of such a life-altering procedure. I don’t know if there was any alternative because I never asked," he says. The surgery lasted four hours and when he came to, he found he was hooked up to multiple machines … then overheard hospital staff saying that the power has gone out in the intensive care unit.

"I remember seeing the fear in my partner John’s eyes as he was trying to reassure me that all went well. I remember thinking in the ICU that if I croaked, I would be in the same death cycle as Bea Arthur, and how this would definitely put me out of the running for a Calvin Klein underwear campaign."

Then at some point during the first night, he had a stroke. "I knew it because I could not feel my left side."

He says he’s "about 75 percent" back to his normal strength, although he has had to completely relearn how to use his left side. "I am currently graduating to walking without a cane, but the pain is un-fucking-believable. At this point I am walking like I spent a good portion of my morning at the Hidden Door."

It hasn’t slowed him down … at least not his mind.

"As someone who has a habit of saying inappropriate things at inappropriate times, I now have an excuse," he winks. "I plan on blaming a lot of my verbal spewing on the stroke. I plan on using the gay stroke card as often as I can in order to create the best show ever. I am still a major media whore and have no shame using whatever means necessary to achieve this goal."

But things are looking up. In addition to returning to his radio program, he’s completed a pilot for the ION Network and signed on to do a program on the Auction Network. He’s lost 20 pounds and says "now I look like I am only carrying quadruplets. And once my stomach flattens out a bit, I plan on wearing my shirts unbuttoned to the navel in order to show of my scar, which I find butch and sexy."

"In the whole scheme of things, I am very lucky," he says. "I have an amazing husband who loves me and puts up with my ‘BMs.’ The support from the creative community of Dallas has been overwhelming and so appreciated. In all seriousness, I have had a major reminder of the importance of health and friendship. The reality is that my heart has been touched in more ways than one."

Saturday’s guests include Steve Kanaly ("Dallas"), Paige Davis, Chris Atkins and Belinda Carlisle; Sunday’s guests are Al B. Sure, Bruce Davison, Rev. Harry Harwick (Betty Bowers) and Greg Louganis. Dallas Voice Life+Style Editor Arnold Wayne Jones will co-host with Jett this weekend.

KERA ADDS MUSIC STATION
North Texas Public Broadcast (KERA) has purchased the non-commercial radio license for 91.7 FM, which will begin broadcasting this fall.

The format for the new public station will be "Triple A" (adult album alternative) music with diverse adult-oriented playlists. Shows from NPR and PRI will supplement the station’s own local broadcasts.

Among the programs being considered for the new station are NPR’s "World Café" and PRI’s "Echoes." Both can be streamed on-line from the distributors’ Web sites.

KERA has broadcast mostly news and information programming since 1996.

Mary Anne Alhadeff, KERA’s president and CEO, says "I heard from long-time listeners who said that they appreciated the expanded public radio news schedule but missed the music programs."

The Dallas market has three full-market FM non-commercial radio licenses. The third is 89.3 KNON-FM, owned by Agape Broadcasting.

KERA broadcasts at 90.1 in Dallas, 88.3 in Wichita Falls, 100.1 in Tyler and 99.3 in Sherman.

This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition June 19, 2009.

VOICE OF PRIDE: Takei becomes Sirius announcer.

The first voice listeners heard on Howard Stern’s debut on Sirius satellite radio was newly out actor George Takei, famous for his Mr. Sulu role on “Star Trek.” The radio host and Takei struck up an unusual friendship during Stern’s terrestrial days. Takei officially came out in October 2005, but Stern listeners were hardly surprised. For the past two years, Stern had playfully teased Takei about his seemingly hoity-toity and persnickety ways. Takei, who has very distinct voice for radio, will act as Stern’s official announcer.

For the first week, Stern said Takei will broadcast live from the studio. From there, Takei will be heard presumably on pre-recorded bits. Takei displayed a good sense of humor as Stern probed him about his recent coming out. They engaged in frank discussions about sex, which didn’t seem to throw the 68-year-old actor.

Live on Sirius from 7 a.m.-noon on Channels Howard 100 and Howard 101.