Whereas and be it resolved …

Posted on 05 Apr 2017 at 12:10pm

Prince performing in the Super Bowl halftime in 2007 — a good show, yeah, but Texas House resolution worthy?

We’re about halfway through the 85th Texas Legislature, and so far, lawmakers have not sent a single bill to Gov. Greg Abbott’s desk for his signature.

Of course, considering some of the trash some folks are trying to turn into Texas law — Dan Patrick’s ridiculous, unnecessary, economically devastating and highly discriminatory bathroom bill, for one, and the “doctors can lie to pregnant women” bill already passed by the Senate and getting a hearing today in the House, for another — the fact they haven’t sent anything to Abbott yet could be a real blessing.

But, as the Houston Chronicle points out, that doesn’t mean legislators haven’t been busy. In fact, as of Sunday, April 2, the Senate and the House together had passed more than 1,500 resolutions.

The Chronicle notes that some of the resolutions were housekeeping-type things having to do with rules and inviting Abbott to come deliver his State of the State speech in January. And, as usual, there were tons of resolutions commemorating sports championships, 100th birthdays, anniversaries of people and events, other special accomplishments.

And that’s perfectly fine with me. These men and women were elected to represent their constituents, and recognizing the accomplishments and milestones of those constituents is, I think, part of the job.

Why would anyone have a problem with a resolution congratulating a constituent on his retirement (House Resolution 116 by Rep. John Frullo, R-Lubbock, congratulates Joseph Ralph DeWitt IV on his retirement as proprietor of Ralph’s Records in Lubbock), or one commemorating a business’ 15th anniversary (House Resolution 52 sponsored by Rep. Mike Schofield, R-Katy, Rep. Cecil Bell, R-Magnolia, and Rep. John Zerwas, R-Richmond commemorates the 15th anniversary of Snappy’s Cafe and Grill in Katy).

And I can understand House Resolution 172, by Rep. Joe Pickett, D-El Paso, which commemorates the 50th anniversary of the University of Texas at El Paso’s NCAA national basketball championship in 1966. And House Resolution 394, by Rep. Travis Clardy, R-Nacogcohes, marking the 80th anniversary of the New London School explosion in north Rusk County is without a doubt worthy.

Others — well, I’m not sure I care about Mexican Fruit Fly Awareness Month, or Javelina Day or Texas Homemade Pie Day (except, you know, pie).

But a Texas House of Representatives Resolution commemorating the 10th anniversary of Prince’s Super Bowl halftime concert? Yeah, I’m gonna have to call bullshit on that one.

And if you read the actual wording of Houston Democratic Rep. Jarvis Johnson’s House Resolution 234, it becomes even more ridiculous:

“WHEREAS, Prince designed a unique, tightly choreographed, impeccably rehearsed spectacle and then surprised the audience of millions with an unconventional set list as well; it commingled some of his own hits, including ‘Let’s Go Crazy’ and ‘1999,’ with a mind-boggling mash-up of Creedence Clearwater Revival’s ‘Proud Mary,’ Bob Dylan’s ‘All Along the Watchtower,’ and Foo Fighters’ ‘Best of You;’ undeterred by a torrential storm over the stadium, he closed with a searing ‘Purple Rain,’ seeming to command the elements as well as the crowd with his epic guitar solo…

“RESOLVED, That the House of Representatives of the 85th Texas Legislature hereby commemorate the 10th anniversary of Prince’s Super Bowl concert and pay tribute to the memory of this incomparable artist.”

I mean, I am a Prince fan and all, but really?

Check out the Chronicle’s resolutions fun facts here.

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