Exactly what do you SERVE for that celebration?

I got word from Abacus, Kent Rathbun’s Uptown resto, that this morning they have received several calls from diners who want to book “celebratory” dinners tonight. What’s the occasion? Why, the assassination of Osama bin Laden, of course!

I suppose people celebrate lots of odd holidays with a meal out, but I can’t help wonder: What does one serve for such an event? Roast pig? Deviled eggs? Falafal? Some kind of seafood (in honor of his ocean burial)?

Any ideas, guys? What would you serve? Or do you find the idea, ummm, distasteful?

—  Arnold Wayne Jones

‘Top Chef’ going gay and Texan in December

On last night’s reunion episode of “Top Chef: D.C.,” Bravo revealed that the next season will feature “all-stars” from each of the seasons past, and not only are several of them gay, some are from right here.

Among those in the eighth season (and first all-star), set to begin airing Dec. 1, are first-season runner-up Tiffani Faison, right, fifth season’s Jaime Lauren, both lesbians, and third season runner-up Dale Levitski, center, who lost to bisexual chef Hung Huynh.

Levitski bested third-placer Casey Thompson, left, who at the time was at Shinsei but now has her own restaurant, Brownstone, in Fort Worth. Thompson will also be on the all-star season, as will fellow third-season alum Tre Wilcox (formerly of Abacus) and the immediate past season’s Tiffany Derry of Go Fish near the Galleria. That’s a lot of Texas — and a lot of gay — to keep us entertained.

Of course, until then, the new installment of “Top Chef: Just Desserts” has plenty of gay guys and even Morgan Wilson of the Dallas Ritz-Carlton. Bon appetit.

—  Arnold Wayne Jones