Chronicle blogger blames ‘It Gets Better” project for LGBT teen suicides

Kathleen McKinley

Kathleen McKinley

Kathy McKinley is a self-described “conservative activist” who blogs for the Houston Chronicle under the monicker “TexasSparkle.” In a recent post McKinley took the “It Gets Better” project to task for what she believes is their culpability in the suicides of LGBT teens:

“These kids were sold a bill of goods by people who thought they were being kind. The “It will get better” campaign just didn’t think it through. They didn’t think about the fact that kids are different from adults. They handle things differently. They react differently. Why? BECAUSE THEY ARE KIDS. You can grumble all day long how unfair it is that straight teens can be straight in high school, and gay kids can’t, but life is unfair. Isn’t the price they are paying too high?? Is it so much to ask them to stand at the door of adulthood before they “come out” publically? Because it may save their life.”

McKinnley’s primary confusion about the “It Gets Better” campaign (other than its name) is the assumption that the goal is to encourage teens to come out of the closet, or encourage them to become sexually active:

“Why in the world would you give teenagers a REASON to tease you? Oh, yes, because the adults tell you to embrace who you are, the only problem? Kids that age are just discovering who they are. They really have no idea yet. The adults tell you to “come out,” when what we should be telling them is that sex is for adults, and there is plenty of time for figuring out that later.”

I would like to encourage Ms. McKinley to watch the “It Gets Better” project’s founder Dan Savages’ video. Please, Ms. McKinley, listen, and tell me if you hear Savage or his partner Terry say anything about teens coming out or having sex. I think what you’ll hear them say is that all of the things that most kids, gay and straight, dream of (falling in love, starting a family, having the support of their parents, co-workers and friends) are possible for LGBT teens. I think you’ll hear them talk about how difficult their teen years were, and about the fears they had that their parents would reject them, that they’d never find success and that they’d always be alone.

Choosing to have sex is one of the most personal decision a person will ever make. For LGBT people, choosing to come out is another. I have not watched all of the thousands of videos from people who have participated in the “It Gets Better” project. It’s possible that there are a few that tell kids to come out right away, or to become sexually active, but I doubt it.

Every video in the project that I have seen has had the same simple message: that the person making it understands how tortuously awful the experience of being Lesbian, Gay, Bisexual or Transgender in Junior and High School can be, but there is a wonderful world of loving, vibrant, successful, engaged LGBT adults out there and if queer teens can just hang on, just for a few years, they can join it. I doubt that any of the contributors to the project think that hanging on for a few years will be easy. I suspect that most of them remember, with excruciating clarity, contemplating ending those temporary years of terror with a permanent solution and that is why they choose to reach out.

I grew up without role models, where people like Barbara Gittings, Bayard Rustin and Harvey Milk didn’t exist . I grew up in a small town where the two men with the pink house were talked about in hushed tones that immediately fell silent when I walked into the room, because it wasn’t appropriate for children’s ears. I grew up in a world where my mother wouldn’t tell me what “gay” meant, where the evening news was turned off if it reported on the AIDS crisis, where I wasn’t given words to describe who I was, and so the only word I could find was “alone.”

I was lucky. My suicide attempt failed.

I was lucky, I survived, and went to college, and found a church that embraced and loved LGBT people. That’s where I met doctors and lawyers and business owners and teachers who were like me. That’s where I met two wonderful women who had built a life together for over 50 years. That’s where I discovered I wasn’t alone and that being gay didn’t mean that i couldn’t have all of those things I’d dreamed of.

That is what McKinley missed in her blog post. In her haste to lay blame on anything other than the overwhelming prejudice perpetuated by schools, churches and governments against LGBT people McKinley missed the fact that kids need role models. In her rush to shove queer teens back into the closet she forgot that human beings need the hope of a better world, lest they give up in despair.

McKinley got one thing right in her post. She titled it “Are Adults Also To Blame For Gay Teen Suicides? Yes.” Adults are to blame for LGBT teen suicides. When adults hide the stunning diversity of God’s creation from their children they create a vision of reality that some of those children can’t see themselves in. When adults tell LGBT teens that they should be invisible then it is all too clear who is to blame when those teens believe them, and take steps to make themselves invisible permanently.

To all the LGBT kids out there: it does get better. There are adults who care about you and want all the wonderful things you dream of to come true, but you have to hang on. If you need to keep who are secret to remain safe then do so. If you need someone to talk to please call the Trevor Project at 866-4-U-Trevor (866-488-7386).

—  admin

Gay groups are cold-hearted, hateful, and cruel, says man who blames gays for six million dead Jews

So many social conservatives simply love, love, love the fact that a crude and cruel disease hit the gay population in this country (as opposed to other countries) earliest and hardest. None more so than the American Family Association’s in-house liability, Bryan Fischer:

Let’s not forget that American tobacco manufacturers were forced to cough up over 0 billion because they peddle a product that kills people.

Well, homosexual activist groups likewise are pushing a lifestyle that kills. If anybody should be obligated to pony up funds to mitigate a health crisis, it ought to be the organizations that are responsible for advocating the very behavior that created and perpetuates the epidemic.

Surely we will be accused of lacking compassion. But this is hardly the case. If you care about an individual, and you see that he is involved in a self-destructive pattern of behavior, the most loving thing you can to is appeal to him to start making better lifestyle choices. It is hardly compassionate to urge him to continue to engage in conduct that everybody in the world knows has a good chance of killing him in the end. That, in fact, is a form of cruelty.

You want to know who the true hate groups in America are, the ones who are sending the most hateful message to gays, there they are. Pro-family groups are trying to save the same people that the gay lobby is consigning to an early death.

The organizations that are showing the most obnoxious form of cold-heartedness are the homosexual activist groups that celebrate lethal behavior. That’s the worst possible message someone can send to his friends: I don’t love you enough to tell you the truth in order to save your life. Where is an ounce of compassion in that?

Uh huh. Right. It’s the groups that push for more recognition of two-partner commitments, distribute safe sex education, direct heightened focus to the most vulnerable populations, and work to remove the sort of shaming that leads young people to see their lives as disposable (and their choices therefore irrelevant) who are fostering danger here in America. You know, the same groups that demanded research and treatment back when stone-casters turned blind eyes: *THEY* are the bad guys in this epidemic. Because everyone knows that when it comes to the Pandora’s Box of diseases that plague the known biological world for reasons unknown, the best prevention doesn’t come from encouragement of the kind of awareness and smart choices that increase prevention with lock-solid efficacy. No, no — the solution is to shun millions of people who exist within that biological reality, cruelly shaming their loving desires based on personal biblical interpretation instead of sharing the wealth of knowledge that’s steeped in credible scientific awareness.

In summation: GLAAD hates acronyms with extra vowels. HRC hates bumper stickers. Lambda Legal find courtrooms cold, drafty, and unfairly activist. And all of these gay factions are killing each other, just like these same gay colaitions once gave rise to “six million dead Jews.

You’re a sage among Christians, Mr. Fischer.

::writer rolls eyes, shakes head, and thanks his brain for having the composure to get through the American shame system that makes his in-born reality a hurdle rather than a characteristic. Many are not as lucky::

**

**FOR THOSE NOT FAMILIAR WITH FISCHER: He’s the guy who’s said that “homosexuals in the military gave us…six million dead Jews,” who’s said “homosexuals should be disqualified from public office,” who has called on Christian conservatives to breed gays and progressives out of existence, has called gay sex a “form of domestic terrorism,” who’s said only gays were savage enough for Hitler, has compared gays to heroin abusers, has directly compared laws against gay soldiers to those that apply to bank robbers, who once invoked a Biblical story about stabbing “sexually immoral” people with spears, saying we need this kind of action in modern day, who has spoken out against gays serving as public school teachers, has questioned why Medals of Honor are given to people who save lives (rather than take lives), who says that open service will “assign the United States to the scrap heap of history,” and who has blamed gay activists for dead gay kids, saying that: “If we want to see fewer students commit suicide, we want fewer homosexual students.” His words pretty much single-handedly landed the American Family Association on the Southern Poverty Law Center’s hate groups list.




Good As You

—  admin

Kathy Griffin Blames Gay Suicides On ‘Trickle Down Homophobia’

"All you anti-gay public figures, and you know who you are, you have the blood of these dead teens on your hands," says Kathy Griffin in message to gay teens — and folks like Tom Emmer, Eddie Long, and Christine O'Donnell. But she also aims her ire at the parents defending the bullies: It's "bullshit. It's about right and wrong."

CONTINUED »


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Biden on Maddow: VP blames politics for WH inability to stop DADT discharges before full repeal

The VP was on The Rachel Maddow Show Wed. night and seemed confident the DefAuth bill was going to pass the Senate and start the DADT repeal process. At least Biden has the stones to flat out say that the current discharges of qualified, trained and ready gay and lesbian service members is due to politics. Via Igor at The Wonk Room, the transcript:

MADDOW: In terms of the timing of that, if that goes as you say it’s possible that it could go. If that repeal happens, the timing is that the Defense Department is studying the issue through December. They’ve got another, I think, 60 days or something that they- after which they would have to delay any repeal process. So, we’d be looking at, best-case scenario for repeal, would be sometime in the spring. With the policy under such intense scrutiny, that study underway at the Defense Department, progress being made both in the courts and politically, why not suspend the discharges of people under the policy now, pending that Defense Department review? Why keep kicking people out now while all of this movement is happening towards ending the policy?

BIDEN: Because that is the compromise we basically had to make to get the votes to finally repeal it. In other words, everybody’s looking for, in my view, if I could just wave a wand, it would just be flat repeal. No one else would be able to suspend it. And everyone who was suspended would be able to come back if they wanted to. But the truth of the matter is, we had to build a consensus for this. Working very hard on the telephone. Calling people. And everybody’s looking forward to the orderly elimination of this law. I would prefer it not be orderly. I prefer it just end, boom, done. But that’s why that hasn’t happened. It’s resulted in us getting over 55 votes, I think we’ll get 55 vote, to flat repeal it.

Surf over to see the video.
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