Celebration of Love Gala raises funds for Lesbian Health Initiative

The scooter's way cuter in pink, sorry Liz

The Lesbian Health Initiative of Houston is celebrating Valentine’s Day a little early with their Celebration of Love Gala Saturday, Feb. 11. at the Double Tree Hotel downtown (400 Dallas Street). The 10th annual gala is the 20-year-old organization’s major fundraiser of the year.

This year the gala features comedienne Susanne Westenhoefer, who claims to be the “first openly-gay comedian to appear on television” (yep, she was out before Ellen).  Dorothy Weston, co-founder and CEO of The Rose (a breast cancer prevention and treatment organization) will be honored  for her years of service. In addition the evening includes dinner, dancing, a silent auction and the raffling of a pink Vitacci 50cc Retro Scooter. LHI executive director Liz James is particularly excited about the raffle even if she didn’t quite get her way on the prize. “I wanted it to be a black scooter, as I’m a bit on the butch side,” said James, adding that more “femme” forces in the organization prevailed and a pink scooter was selected instead.

Regardless of the color of the scooter, the Celebration of Love Gala promises to be a fun filled night, not just for sapphic romantics, but for anyone looking for a valentine’s date night that supports a good cause. Tickets for the black tie affair start at $100 and can be purchased at lhihouston.org. Doors open at 6 pm.

—  admin

Fox goes uber-gay with ‘Allen Gregory,’ ‘American Dad’

Say what you want about their news channel and their leadership, but Sunday night on the Fox broadcast network was about as gay as TV gets.

It started, of course, with The Simpsons, one of the most gay-friendly shows on TV (though Sunday night’s was only gayish — it dealt with foodies). Also on deck was Family Guy — again, a tres gay series with a queer little baby who wants to take over the world and characters who break out into Broadway production numbers at the drop of a hat. We’re used to that.

But it reached new heights of homophilia with Allen Gregory and American Dad.

Allen Gregory is the new series from Jonah Hill. The premise of the show is already inherently queer: Two gay dads, pictured, rear their pretentious little 7-year-old Allen Gregory. There have been, in the previous few outings, several jokes per episode about gay sex between the pompous dad Richard (voiced by French Stewart) and his butch, derided partner Jeremy. But last night, not only were the dads central characters, the plot was all about a school dance where all the students in the elementary school were expected to ask same-sex partners to the dance. This is edgy stuff for established cable shows, but for “family night” on a freshman series?! Wow. The episode was not only funny (I’m already a huge fan of the series), but also witheringly insightful about perceptions of gay people. And the attempted seduction of Jeremy by Richard (including dropped towel) was hilarious.

That was followed by American Dad — again, well-established with a gay history, from the out couple across the street to the fey alien Roger who lives in the attic. But Roger finally met someone romantic … and it turned out the be Ricky Martin. The episode included Ricky and Roger kissing on a couch (and they were really going at it). You gotta love that!

I hope the ratings for both shows are good, and they are certainly worth a Hulu.com (here for American Dad, here for Allen Gregory) visit. Enjoy!

—  Arnold Wayne Jones

WATCH: In the wake of Britney’s show, soldiers get ‘Drop Dead (Beautiful)’

This video just popped up on my Twitter feed and it might be more entertaining than Tuesday’s Britney Spears concert.

I’m not quite sure how the trend of masculine, butch soldier boys doing pop princess tunes on YouTube started (this is still my favorite), but it continues with these four men taking on Spears’ “Drop Dead (Beautiful)” from Femme Fatale. With all the abs, pecs and guns (the real kind) present, Spears should hire these boys stat. That is if Abercrombie & Fitch doesn’t.

The 1:29 mark was especially grabbing. If not, at the very least, jaw-dropping — in so many ways.

 

—  Rich Lopez

COVER STORY: Butch Voices

Q-Roc Ragsdale, from left, Eva Rivera, Michelle Paris and Theresa Strong.

‘Masculine of center’ women say that, all labels aside, it’s about being comfortable and confident in being yourself — whoever you are

TAMMYE NASH  | Senior Editor
nash@dallasvoice.com

At 53, Theresa Strong is used to being called “sir.” She’s accustomed to the double-takes when she uses a public restroom. She’s used to the stares. None of it bothers her.

“I’m very comfortable with who I am. I have been a tomboy all my life,” Strong says.

In “the old days,” Strong would have been called a “butch.” Although some people still use that term, today it’s more common to hear “stud,” instead. At least, in some places.

The terminology varies from region to region, from culture to culture, even from race to race, says Q-Roc Ragsdale, a Dallas lesbian who, like Strong, is considered a “stud.”

Ragsdale, who works with the group that stages the national Butch Voices conference, says that here in North Texas terms like “aggressive,” “dominant,” “boi,” “tomboy” and “macha” are common, depending on where you live and your cultural background. And then there are the “degrees” of butch: “hard stud,” “soft stud,” and so on.

But whatever label you use, Radsdale says, its about a “masculine of center” identity that is a natural state for some women but that, at the same time, can put them at odds with the society around them.

“It’s not male; it’s masculine. There’s a difference,” Ragsdale says. “A lot of people don’t understand the difference between sex and gender. Gender is so fluid. It’s a spectrum. … There are woman-identified butches, trans-identified butches. Some use male pronouns and some use female pronouns. Some are just butch in presentation. Some don’t like gender roles, and some live gender roles.

“You can’t make assumptions. You can’t generalize. Our community is so diverse, just like any other community,” Ragsdale says.

Challenges

But one thing most masculine of center women share, she adds, is a sense of living outside the mainstream. And that can often leave them facing many disadvantages.
Butch Voices aims to help correct those disadvantages with its three-pronged mission focusing on physical and mental health, social and economic justice and community building.

As a masculine of center woman, “there are just so many different social norms that you challenge,” Ragsdale says. “You challenge gender norms. You challenge the mainstream notion of lesbians.” And those challenges can sometimes make life difficult.

When that happens, Ragsdale says, it can affect a person’s mental health. “Butch women often have to go through a double coming out. They have to come out as lesbians, then they have to come out again as butch women. Depending on where you live, geographically, that can be hard, and it can affect a person’s mental health,” she says.

Lesbians in general often don’t have the same access to health care, and it can be even more pronounced for butch women.

“It’s very uncomfortable sitting in that waiting room with a lot of women, and then they call your name and all the other women are looking at you, wondering why ‘that dude’ is there,” Ragsdale says. “And it’s hard for a lot of butch women to have the kind of conversations they need to have with a doctor.”

She cites, as an example, trying to explain to a doctor why she wouldn’t agree to taking birth control pills, which can be used to control menstruation as well as to avoid pregnancy.

“I had a girlfriend who went on birth control once, and it made her breasts bigger. [As a stud], I don’t want my breasts to be bigger. It’s hard to explain that to a doctor who is not understanding me and my relationship with my body,” Ragsdale says.

It’s even more conflicting for women in the category that used to be referred to as “stone butch.” A lot of butches, Ragsdale says, “don’t want anybody at all ‘down there,’ whether it be a partner or otherwise.”

Women who don’t fit traditional gender stereotypes also often find themselves unemployed or under-employed, especially when they are unwilling to compromise on their identity or gender presentation, Ragsdale says.

“I have a mentor in her early 50s who has always been butch, and even she has advised me that ‘you need to femme it up’ to get a job or keep a job. Personally, I am against that. I won’t do it. But I know a lot of people who do it, a lot of teachers especially,” Ragsdale says.

And then there’s that third prong of the Butch Voices mission: building community.

“We are working to create an environment where everyone can be themselves and still get the kind of health care and work they want and need,” Ragsdale explains. “A lot of that work is about awareness. There is a lot of mystery surrounding the butch identity; it’s plagued with so many stereotypes. That’s why I always encourage people to have the courage to ask questions.

“A lot of people are deterred from asking questions because they don’t understand us. But if they’d take the time to get to know us on a personal level, it would make a big difference,” she adds. “And that’s not just in the mainstream community. I think there are a lot of stereotypes and misconceptions about butches in the lesbian community, too. We have to start at home, in our own community. To the lesbians who don’t get it, who don’t understand us, well, I say just know that we are still women, still lesbians, still part of your community.”

Even among the masculine of center community itself, Ragsdale acknowledges, there are differences. “Every butch, every stud is different,” she says. “Sometimes people get caught up in labels. It’s like the word ‘dyke.’ Some people have reclaimed ‘dyke.’ Others hate the word. What I say to them is, at what point do we stop worrying about the semantics and just get things done? We have to celebrate all our identities and work for all the community and not spend time debating the labels.”

Taking responsibility

But while masculine of center women face any number of challenges, that more masculine identity and presentation also “comes along with some male privilege,” Ragsdale says. And with that bit of male privilege comes responsibility.

“If you are a butch, or a stud, and you get that bit of male power and privilege, then you have a responsibility to use that power and privilege in the right way and not abuse it — not in your personal life, and not in the world,” she says.

And in the same vein, butch women need to pool that male power and privilege to work for positive change for the community as a whole.

“We have got to get our whole community more involved [in the battle for LGBT equality],” Ragsdale says. “If you go to a meeting or event for one of the more mainstream LGBT groups — like Lambda Legal or Human Rights Campaign — you’d be really hard pressed to find any butches or studs. Maybe that’s because the mainstream LGBT community looks down on us. But maybe it’s because we don’t try to be involved.

“We have to focus on mobilizing our base. We can’t sit around and cry about how we aren’t being included if we aren’t even bothering to show up in the first place,” Ragsdale says.

It’s personal

Ragsdale, like Strong, can trace her stud roots back to her childhood. She remembers her mother giving her a Barbie doll, when what she really wanted was the Ninja Turtles and the G.I. Joes her brother got. Still, she played with the Barbies, wanting to fit into the role her parents and society had mapped out for little girls.

Eventually though, Ragsdale came to terms first with her sexual orientation and later with her more masculine identity as a stud. It’s all about, she says, finding that comfort level that allows you to be who you are.

Eva Rivera and Michelle Paris both describe themselves as “soft butches.” While they may lean toward the more masculine end of the gender spectrum, that doesn’t mean they always ignore the more feminine accoutrement, like makeup or jewelry.

“I guess a soft stud is kind of a mixture of femme and stud,” Rivera says. “I am tomboyish. I always have been. I came out at 19, and the way I dressed then was sporty — you know, tennis shoes and baggy jeans. I never wore a dress, and I have always been attracted to feminine women.”

Being a stud is partly about the way a woman dresses and her mannerisms, Rivera says. “You take on a role. But we’re not all the same. Being a butch or a stud, being hard or soft or whatever — it’s just what makes you comfortable,” she adds.

Paris agrees: “I am a soft butch. That’s just the way I am. Underlying that is who I date. I like feminine women. And in a relationship, I am the more dominant one. But I don’t have to make a big deal of it.

“I am the same with everyone — family, friends, people I know, people I don’t know. I am the same; I am myself,” Paris continues. “When you see those women who are always trying to prove what studs they are, that’s because they have low self esteem. They make it more of an issue because they are trying to prove something, to themselves or to other people. Me, I don’t care. I am who I am.”

And that, says Strong, is at the core of the issue: Self-esteem and confidence and a sense of self that doesn’t rely on labels or clothes or mannerisms.

“You have to be comfortable with yourself. You have to be confident in yourself,” Strong says. “We [as masculine of center] women are so diverse. Everything that women are and do, we are and we do. My best friend is a stud, but she has a son, so she’s playing all the roles.

“The fact is, I dress the way I dress because it’s comfortable for me. You like who you like, and I like very feminine women. I am courting a woman right now and she is totally femme,” Strong adds. “This is who I am. I am not playing a role. This is just natural for me. We may be butch or studs or whatever word you want to use, but at the end of the day, we take off our clothes, and we’re still women. A lot of people forget that.”

This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition March 4, 2011.

—  John Wright

Q-Roc TV announces a roll bounce kind of fundraiser for this March

Local filmmaker Q-Roc Ragsdale is a human dynamo and it seems like she has her hand on the pulse of everything. She works with the Fahari Arts Institute, The Butch Boi Project, the DFW Senators and those just barely scratch the surface. But perhaps her biggest venture is her online TV network Q-Roc TV.  Through her network she ” celebrates uniqueness and differences of the queer community through an eclectic mix of individual features, special events coverage, celebrity guests and man-on-the-street interviews.” And that is no lie. You can see her work either on the site or her YouTube channel.

So that she can get her new season underway, Ragsdale is hosting a fundraiser for the network. And this ain’t your stuffy, dressy kind. She’s scheduled the Q-Roc and Roll LGBT Skate Party for March 11. Yes, you can do your best Xanadu/Starlight Express moves while contributing to the network that aims “to provide quality programming that shows queer people in a positive light.” Did you ever think shooting the duck would have such an impact on the community?

I guess roller blades are OK, but I’m hoping to see some old school, four-wheel, lace-up skates on that rink. With sparkles!

To order tickets at the advanced price of $12, click here.

 

—  Rich Lopez

WATCH: Dallas Bears Chili Cook-off

The Dallas Bears hosted their first Chili Cook-Off at the Hidden Door on Saturday afternoon. Seventeen LGBT organizations and individual competitors vied for tickets while raising money for charities.

“This year our beneficiaries are Youth First, AIDS Services of Dallas and AIDS Interfaith Network,” said Bears President Wayne Davis.

For $5 local tasters received six spoons, a bowl and a ticket to vote on the best chili.

“Our focus is raising money for AIDS-related charities throughout our community,” said Bears Treasurer Devon DeVasqez.

Despite cool weather, the crowd quickly swelled to more than 150 tasters coming and going.

“We all need to give back to the community in whatever form or fashion we can,” said Larry Finch, former DB president. “Whether it’s our time, our money or just our support to the organizations.”

From “sweet with a kick” to “hot and spicy,” competitors enticed tasters with various prepared chili creations. As the crowd began to fill up and wind down, an auction was held while tickets and scores were tallied.

There were seven winners:

• Best Tasting Chili: The SLUTS

• Best Theme Presentation: The United Court of the Lone Star Empire

• Best Individual Entry: Doctor Dang

• Best Group Entry: TGRA

• Hottest Chili: Discipline Core 2 of 2

• Community Favorite, which received the most tickets: United Court of the Lone Star Empire

But the grand title, Best Overall, went to Butch Compton.

“It’s all out of good fun,” Compton said upon receiving his trophy and certificate. “I enjoy the happiness on people’s faces when they eat something that’s tasty.”

—  admin

Lesbians on the lam, but not a perfect love story

I was looking through LGBT-related news from around the Internet on Wednesday morning when this headline from the New Zealand news site TVNX caught my attention: “Indonesian lesbian frees underage lover.”

My imagination immediately conjured up images of the lesbian Butch and Sundance, the teenage Thelma and Louise, only with a happier ending. We all like to root for the underdogs, and I immediately started envisioning these two young lesbians on the run, so much in love they were willing to risk it all to be together. I imagined LGBT groups from around the world banding together to spirit them away from the oppressive anti-gay forces that would keep them apart, to a place of freedom.

Then I read the story.

Here are the basics: a 15-year-old Indonesian girl identified as Tn had been placed, by her father, in protective custody with the National Commission for Child Protection in East Jakarta. The father wanted to “cure” his daughter of her homosexuality. Then the girl’s lover, a 26-year-old taekwondo teacher identified as Sj, showed up and busted the teenager out of protective custody, and the two went on the lam.

The story points out that the jailbreak happened on Sept. 17, “the first day of the Islamic Eid ul Fitri celebrations.” I didn’t know what that was, so I looked it up and discovered that it was the festival celebrating the end of the 30 days of dawn-to-dusk fasting that takes place during the Islamic holy month of Ramadan. I am not sure why that info was included.

The story says police are investigating.

Needless to say, the facts of the story quickly put to rest my “lesbian lovers on the run” romantic movie ideas. I mean the “cruel father who imprisons his daughter to ‘cure’ her lesbianism” would be an integral part of the plot of such a movie. But I really don’t find anything romantic about a 26-year-old dating a 15-year-old, regardless of the genders involved.

—  admin

Ben Quayle is running for Congress in Arizona; here’s one person’s response to his ever-so-butch campaign ad

Ben Quayle, son of the spelling-impaired former vice president, Dan Quayle, is running as a Republican to represent Arizona in Congress. And he’s has a campaign ad out that start’s with his declaration that President Barack Obama is the worst president ever.

It’s a very butch ad, with Ben looking stern and determined. But some folks aren’t buying the butch act. Check out YouTube user robtish’s “tiniest of tweaks” to the ad:

—  admin

Beyond Butch


Keynote speaker Jessica Pettitt

By Renee Baker, GenderPower.com

If there’s one thing I’ve discovered in life, it is that I don’t have to take many steps forward before I stick another foot in my mouth.

This time, it happened just after I attended the Butch Voices Conference June 5 at Resource Center Dallas.

I was posting a note to my Facebook friends about the conference, and since I don’t identify as a butch, I made a “pre-emptive” statement saying, “And NO, I am not a butch!”

A friend called me to the carpet, “You said that as though it’s a bad thing to be butch.” I had to launch “Butch Appreciation Week” as my FB status to save myself!

Truly, I just didn’t want to be identified as butch, because I identify more as feminine. And truly, I do appreciate butches and we should start an appreciation week.

But being a transgender woman, I never felt an identity such as butch or femme applied to me. It is even a stretch for me to say I am a lesbian, though I’m in a relationship with another gal.

All these labels are still perplexing and complex. It takes about two seconds for the arguing to begin on what they all mean, what the implications are and who takes rightful ownership.

But a beautiful thing happened — there was none of this ego/identity arguing at the BV Conference. As Alpha Thomas said, it was all about honoring and respecting one another. Everyone had a chance to speak.

A major mission point of the BV Conference was and is to explore identities and embrace an entire spectrum of those who identify as Masculine of Center (a term coined by B. Cole of the Brown BOI Project).

It was not about “you have to be and do this,” in order “to qualify that you are this.”

Or as the conference organizers put it, “The point is, we don’t decide who is Butch, Stud or Aggressive. You get to decide for yourself.”

Thomas, an elder in the community, was happy to hear keynote speaker Jessica Pettitt urging everyone to relax about what a butch identity is. She had been waiting to hear this message for years.

She said, “God, am I hearing this? … I can’t believe this.”

Thomas said, “All these lines and labels separate us, they cause us to not work together, and it is time for the division to stop.”

She says we are an oppressed LGBT people and are oppressing each other with all these labels.

BV was a multi-cultural, age-diverse, mom and daughter, butch and butch-ally attended conference. And Thomas said, “The diversity made me feel so good.”

About 50 people were in attendance — including two men.

Wan-Lin Tsou felt the relaxed “define yourself” atmosphere to be very welcoming as well. She said the conference and keynote speaker really helped her to be proud of being a soft-butch that is attracted to other butches.

She said she had an “aha moment” when she realized she did “not need to feel weird or less-than just because I don’t necessarily match others’ … definition of being a part of the butch/femme dichotomy.”

Tsou also added, “It was also really enlightening to really look at labels as so limiting to not only myself but how I relate to others. Who is to say I can’t fall for a femme, too? And just because she ‘looks’ femme doesn’t mean that the way she carries herself isn’t butcher than me!”

For more about the Butch Voice National and Regional Conferences, go online to ButchVoices.com.

—  Dallasvoice