Gap partners with El Centro to offer curriculum

There’s nothing particularly gay about this item, except that one of El Centro College’s gay professors alerted us to it. And as part of Dallas County Community College, El Centro added protections based on gender identity to its nondiscrimination policies earlier this year. And it does concern San Francisco-based, but not-really-gay The Gap and El Centro’s not-really-gay but probably-mostly-gay fashion department.

Gap Inc. has chosen El Centro as one of 15 community colleges across the country to participate in its “Gap for Community Colleges” program. The program is part of President Barack Obama’s “Skills for America’s Future” initiative.

Beginning this week, El Centro College fashion marketing students will have access to the training curriculum given to Gap store managers covering a variety of workplace skills. This is the first time the program has been offered outside the company and will be useful to students not seeking a career with Gap Inc., including topics such as interview skills and resume writing as well as workplace skills such as managing people and setting priorities.

 

 

—  David Taffet

Planning, preparation can make the holidays much more jolly for all

LGBTs often deal with stress, depression during the holiday season due to family issues

Candy Marcum

Candy Marcum

DAVID TAFFET  |  Staff Writer
taffet@dallasvoice.com

Many people have such high expectations for the holidays that they get depressed when those expectations aren’t met. And in the LGBT community, dealing with family issues is often painful.

Counselor Candy Marcum said that holiday depression is the gap between how you think your life should work and how it is working.

“If you think Christmas should be family and love and laughter and you’re having trouble paying the rent and your family rejects you, then work to lessen the gap,” Marcum said.
She suggested changing the idea of how the holiday should be.

Marcum said that many people come out to family during the holidays because that’s when families get together.

And coming out in person is usually better than over the phone.

But, Marcum said, making a big announcement at the dinner table might not be the best way to do it.
Counselor Randy Martin said that anyone intending to come out to family over the holiday needs to plan and prepare beforehand.

“Find someone to bounce it off of,” such as a friend or sibling, he said. “Like a dry run.”

But when to spring the news? Each family is different, Martin said.

In some families, it’s best to talk about big news in pairs.

In others, groups are fine.

If a family has an expectation of how holiday dinner should be, interrupting it with this sort of news might not be the best idea. But in some families it could be the perfect setting, Martin suggested said.

Going home for the holidays and introducing a new partner is another stressful situation. Even the fully accepting family may react awkwardly to the new situation.

Randy-Martin-photo

Randy Martin

Marcum suggests staying in a nearby hotel might be the answer to avoiding family conflict. That avoids the embarrassing question of sleeping arrangements.

Or talk to family ahead of time. Staying with a sibling or other relative might work also.

Martin agreed that a hotel stay could be a perfect alternative for a couple during a holiday visit: “Maybe Grandpa smokes and one of you can’t tolerate it, or your family gets up much earlier than you do,” he said.

He added that any number of situations could make it simpler all the way around not to stay with one’s parents.

Marcum said another uncomfortable situation is visiting family after a breakup. While you might have moved on, everyone else could be feeling the loss for the first time, she said.

“Now you’ve got a new one [partner],” Marcum said. “That’s awkward at best.”

Martin agreed. “The family already has a pattern down. Do what you can to let everyone else catch up,” he said.

Loneliness is another common problem many people in the LGBT community face during the holidays.

Happy childhood memories of the holidays can bring on a bout of depression when those expectations will not be met because of family rejection, Marcum said.

Others are alone for the holidays simply because of distance, cost of travel or having to work.

Martin suggested doing some extra preparation for the holidays, especially if that time of year tends to be difficult. While many people spend quite a bit of time going to parties and shopping for everyone else, he suggested spending time making plans for yourself.

“Loneliness is real,” Martin said. “We’re hard-wired to be connected. Make plans.”

And he said make back-up plans in case other plans fall through. Think of whom to contact if you’re alone — maybe someone to go with to a movie.
Marcum agreed, adding, “Be good to yourself.”

“Make a plan that pleases you,” she said. “Whatever gives you joy.”

She suggested going to church, volunteering in a soup kitchen or having friends or neighbors over.

“Buy yourself something,” she suggested. “Wrap it up and put it under the tree.”

She said that when sadness around the holiday is a result bad family relations, keep the door open.

“Take the high road with your family,” Marcum said. “Continue to reach out.”

That includes inviting them to visit, and calling or sending cards and emails to keep in touch.

Martin’s general advice is to stay connected. He said that if exercise is part of your regular routine, make time to get in a workout. He said to not let all the parties and shopping and pressure from the holiday become overwhelming.

And Marcum gives a word of warning about drinking during the holiday “Watch your alcohol intake,” she said. “Alcohol is a depressant.”

This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition December 9, 2011.

—  Kevin Thomas

Cooking up some lame duck soup

Can the Democrats use the lame-duck session to make good on all their promises to the LGBT community? If not, then maybe we should start looking for candidates who will keep their promises

Hardy Haberman | Flagging Left

Do you hear that quacking sound? Nope it’s not the AFLAC duck, but a lame-duck Congress.

During this session, members who have been ousted can take their parting shots and actually try to do some of the things they promised before the previous election.

You would think that would be as easy as duck soup. Heck, what have they got to lose?

Well, that remains to be seen. When Congress returns on Monday, Nov. 15, they will have a lot of work to do. Much of it is related to spending. During the last session, not a single spending measure passed — which means that if the government is not going to shut down, a stop-gap measure will have to be enacted.
Then there is the matter of those Bush-era tax cuts that are set to expire. These affect mainly the wealthiest Americans, and you can bet the GOP won’t let these die without a fight.

The Democrats have a stake in it as well. There was a token: The $1,000-per-child tax credit that would be pared down to $500 and some relief on the “marriage penalty” that will make this a tough pill to swallow for the left.

On the health care front, there is a provision on Medicare that cuts what doctors are paid by 23 percent. That most likely will have to be fixed.

And on the Social Security front, there is a proposed one-time $250 payment to some seniors who didn’t get a cost-of-living adjustment this year. That measure didn’t fly in the previous session, and there is no telling what will happen to it now.

There is lots of unfinished business that was put on hold prior to the election when both parties were afraid to do anything that could be used as ammunition against them during the campaigns. Now the big question is, will Congress actually get down to business and do their job?

Your guess is a good as mine.

And then there is the “elephant in the room,” or more appropriately the “donkey in the room.”

That mythic creature consists of the LGBT issues that are still just empty promises. DADT, an unjust policy that even Defense Secretary Robert Gates wants repealed, may or may not get addressed, much less the Defense of Marriage Act or the Employment Non-Discrimination Act.

Though some progress has been made on the human rights front, LGBT citizens are still second-class when it comes to employment discrimination, marriage and serving in the military.

Wouldn’t it be a wonderful thing if the politicians put away their rhetoric and actually looked at the inequity caused by this institutionalized discrimination?
Wouldn’t it be nice if the president used some of his remaining political capital to actually push the reluctant Democrats to do the right thing?

So far, even though President Barack Obama has repeatedly said DADT will be ended “on his watch,” there doesn’t seem to be any effort beyond rhetoric toward this end. I am beginning to doubt whether he or Congress has the political will (read “balls”) to pick up the LGBT hot potato.

After expending so much energy on enacting health care reforms, and being incredibly unsuccessful in framing the issue before the GOP dubbed it “Obama Care,” I don’t know if any further measures will happen.

Now, we have to rely on the remaining Democrats and those who have lost their seats to use the brief time of this lame-duck session to take up our cause, when they have a whole year’s worth of bills log-jammed in Congress. Since many of these representatives are not coming back to Washington after Jan. 1, our leverage with them is limited.

What can we do? Well, aside from the fantasy of the GOP suddenly deciding to turn gay-friendly, something that would blunt one of the most effective weapons in their arsenal of fear-based tactics, we might do well to punt.

Punting in this case means trying some unorthodox tactics.

Though I am loathe to say it, that might include more lawsuits like the Log Cabin Republicans tried against DADT. While I am still a bit suspect of their real agenda, which I believe was to embarrass the Obama Administration, at least it’s a shot.

Left-wing LGBT groups are going after the Defense of Marriage Act at a national level with lawsuits. This tactic will likely hit the brick wall of the Bush-era-packed Supreme Court, but it’s worth a shot.

Frankly, I am tired of being patient, and if the lame-duck Congress doesn’t deliver on its many promises to the LGBT community, then we might have to start finding new candidates who are actually socially liberal.

Unfortunately, that will be a much tougher recipe than duck soup.

Hardy Haberman is a longtime local LGBT activist and a member of Stonewall Democrats of Dallas. His blog is at http://dungeondiary.blogspot.com.

This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition November 12, 2010.

—  Michael Stephens

FWPD chief hopes to start hate crimes unit

Halstead asks for community’s help in securing funds for special unit, pledges to increase diversity


Tammye Nash  |  Senior Editor nash@dallasvoice.com

SEEKING INPUT | Fort Worth Police Chief Jeffrey Halstead listens to one of the more than 50 residents who attended a FWPD Diversity Forum this week. During the forum, Halstead announced plans to seek grants to fund a special unit to investigate hate crimes in the city. (Tammye Nash/DallasVoice)

Fort Worth Police Chief Jeffrey Halstead this week reaffirmed his commitment to maintaining a diverse police force staffed by officers who are aware of and sensitive to the special needs and issues of the city’s racially, ethnically and culturally diverse communities.

“We need people like the community to serve the community,” Halstead said during the community forum held Tuesday night, Aug. 31, at the Hazel Harvey Peace Center for Neighborhoods.

“There is strength in diversity, and if the police department doesn’t grow in diversity along with the city, you will see the gap,” Halstead said.

The chief also said he is pursuing grant money the department could use to establish a special unit, or at least an individual officer, dedicated specifically to investigating hate crimes in the city.

Halstead told the more than 50 people gathered for the Fort Worth Police Department Diversity Forum — organized by the department’s public relations department — that the department currently has no one trained to investigate hate crimes, which he said come with a special set of often intense and intensely-sensitive issues.

Hate crimes — such recent incidents of vandalism at a local mosque — “come with a nexus of issues that don’t occur in every crime,” Halstead said, adding that when officers who aren’t trained to recognize and deal with hate crimes can come across as rude and insensitive because “they are not understanding those special issues and the motivation behind such crimes.”

Halstead said that he has a “very narrow window of opportunity that is already closing” to acquire funding for a hate crimes unit, and he asked the community to “help us in moving forward with this.”

He asked that those in the community interested in helping the department by providing the information necessary to prove need for such a unit contact Lt. Paul Henderson, his chief of staff, at 817-392-4241.

Building diversity

Halstead said that he had recently returned from the three-day Consortium for Police Leadership and Equity conference, dedicated to building diversity and equity within police departments.

He said he had been invited to the conference “because of the progress we’re making” in Fort Worth toward those goals. But he acknowledged that the FWPD faces “significant challenges” in maintaining a diverse police force over the next five to 20 years. Some of those challenges, he said, arise out of the deep budget cuts forced on the city by the ongoing economic crisis.

“Some departments have had to sell off whole work divisions to make their budgets. We have had to be very creative to meet the 5 percent cuts the city has asked us to make,” Halstead said. “We are already grossly under-staffed. But we have cut $9 million from our budget without one layoff.”

To do that, the chief said, the police department has “retooled parts of our organization to maximize efficiency in our highest priority services,” but he added that the department has to plan today to meet the needs of future.

“What will our city look like in 20 years? We have to think about that now in our recruitment. We don’t have enough diversity in the department now, and that need will just continue to grow as the city grows,” he said. “We need to see a higher mix of persons to serve our rapidly growing city. You all know people in your communities who would make excellent police officers. We need you to encourage them to pursue this as a career.”

Recruitment officers speaking at the forum said that a group of about 1,450 applicants were that same night taking the civil service exam to join the department, and they “appear to be a very diverse group.”

LINES OF COMMUNICATION | Officer Sara Straten, the Fort Worth Police Department’s LGBT liaison, talks to Fairness Fort Worth President Thomas Anable after Tuesday’s FWPD Diversity Forum. Chief Jeffrey Halstead created Straten’s liaison position following the June 2009 raid on the Rainbow Lounge, the same incident that prompted the creation of Fairness Fort Worth. (Tammye Nash/Dallas Voice)

That group of applicants represented “about 50 percent” of those who had been identified as eligible to apply, according to Sgt. Klein, who said the applicants had been recruited from forums that include LGBT job fairs, military job fairs, church activities, community forums, crime fairs and college and university campuses.

She said that the department has no openings beyond this current class of officer trainees, but that “we feel it is important for the academy staff to stay in contact” with possible future cadets. To that end, academy staff members will continue to attend job fairs and community events, including the upcoming Tarrant County Gay Pride Week parade, block party and picnic, set for early October.

Klein said that possible recruits are not asked about their sexual orientation, so she had no idea how many of those take the civil service exam for the next academy class were LGBT.

However, Sgt. Garcia, another academy staff member, said that FWPD recruiters “interest was great” at a recent LGBT job fair FWPD recruiters attended. “We got a great reception there.And based on the number of e-mails I got afterward, I believe we got a great response” in terms of LGBT people who applied.

The department’s LGBT liaison, Officer Sara Straten, later said she, too, had received a large number of e-mails and phone calls from people in the LGBT community interested in applying for the police force.

Halstead said he believes the response from the LGBT community has come in response to the department’s outreach to the community in the wake of the Rainbow Lounge raid in June 2009.

“Where else have you seen such a catastrophic event happen, and then seen such good things happen?” Halstead said. “We do have challenges ahead of us, but this department is more open and caring than ever before.”

He continued, “The biggest challenge for any officer is fulfilling the expectations of the job and of the community. Sometimes an officer’s actions can be perceived as rude, but anyone who takes the oath has a personal calling to protect.”

Halstead described an incident that happened to him as a young man living in Miami when an officer there stopped him without cause and assaulted him “just because I had long hair and dark skin and was driving a fancy car,” which the officer saw as a sure sign he was a drug dealer.

That incident, he said, instilled in him the drive to create a police force where such things wouldn’t happen.

“I have zero tolerance for anyone being disrespected” by an officer on his police force, he said. “If you do that, you have violated your oath. Now the challenge for me is to build a police force that provides holistic service, 24-7. An officer can provide great service, even after an arrest has been made.”

This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition September 3, 2010.

—  Michael Stephens