At first it struck me as odd that A Good Old Fashioned Orgy would be opening in suburban theaters (Mesquite, Grapevine, Arlington) instead of urban, sophisticated Dallas. Then I saw it, and understood: There’s nothing urban or sophisticated whatsoever about this mostly unfunny, post-adolescent take on American Pie, Porky’s, and the rest of sitcomovies about losers hoping to get laid. The difference is, these losers are yuppies who should know better. (They are all supposed to be high school friends now turning 30, but most appear to be pushing 40.) When ringleader Eric (Jason Sudeikis, pictured left with Tyler Labine) finds his dad is selling the Hamptons beach house he and his friends commandeer every holiday for drunken bashes, he gets the (contrived and formulaic) idea to hold a parting orgy — just a little casual sex among friends. First, he has to convince them all to do it. Then they have to go through with it.
If it sounds naughty, it’s not. These dilettantes could learn a thing or 30 about hookups from just about any gay man, and like most comedies of this ilk, the idea of girl-on-girl action is hot; a tentative kiss between two fellas? Gross. (That doesn’t stop it from showing full frontal, though of no one worth seeing.)
Films like this are usually so smugly coy about being sexy and clever they are neither; that’s about the only bull’s-eye this lame, Labor Day dreg release hits.
— Arnold Wayne Jones
One star. Now playing in limited release.
This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition September 2, 2011.