Rampant homosexuality among Pashtun men, not that there's anything wrong with that

Hamid Karzai is Pashtun
Hamid Karzai is Pashtun

And you know this story HAS to be true, because it’s from Fox News.

According to Fox, an unclassified military report said there’s a high incidence of homosexuality among Pashtun men in Afghanistan. President Hamid Karzai is Pashtun but has not returned a call from Dallas Voice for comment.

But Pashtun men don’t think they’re gay because their definition of gay is to love another man, not just have sex with them.

They couldn’t understand how they got gonorrhea anally since they’re not gay.

U.S. military doctors had to explain to them how to get their wives pregnant, which they found repulsive since women are “unclean.”

“Surely this must be wrong,” one Pashtun man said to the military doctor.

Well, we here at Dallas Voice certainly agree and support our Pashtun pals. Maybe the military docs could start giving them cootie shots.

According to the report, the military teaches that Pashtun men are effeminate, but that’s not an indication of homosexuality. They blame the Afghan brand of homosexuality on the severe separation of men and women in Afghan society. Maybe if there were some gays in the military, they could get a better handle on the situation.

Interesting that we just committed 40,000 new troops to go to Afghanistan to fight against the Taliban and defend our allies, the Pashtun, who, it turns out, are flaming queens.

—  David Taffet