Tallywackers set to open in old Lolita’s space

Posted on 22 Apr 2015 at 10:04am

TallyKids today grow up in a more sophisticated time. When I was a lad, we used lot of euphemisms to describe body parts. One I learned at a young age, but have rarely heard used since I was 8, is “tallywacker,” meaning penis. I’m not sure of the etymology, but it seems to me “tallywacker” sounds like something much, much worse than penis.

So the addition to the gayborhood of a new restaurant called Tallywackers conjures up all sorts of memories from childhood. Innocence. Shame. Infantilization of genitalia. And wieners.

Well, the wieners in a bun is what the owners of Tallywackers probably want you to think about. It’s being called the male equivalent of Hooters, which famously serves wings (hooters … owls … wings … get it?), though the wording is far less subtle. The servers — who were being recruited over the weekend — will be hot young men clad in towels, undies, etc.

It shouldn’t be surprising, or even that offensive. I mean, how many times have you bought a glowing vial of alcohol from a bikini-wearing go-go boy at a nightclub, or a drink from a leatherman in a jockstrap? Does it make a difference that someone wants to sell fries with that shake?

The restaurant is scheduled to begin service in May. Here’s to hoping they have a big opening.

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