Fellas, if you got some faghags who like to throw down, make them be your date for a night at Master Blaster Ladies Club.

Right off of I-35 at Commonwealth, this dick-dancing establishment is a lavish hoot. Every guy must have a female companion. I recently attended with two cool gals. They got in for free, I paid an $8 cover. It was a Friday night, and the place was jam-packed. Expect to valet your car ($5) because you won’t be able to find a parking spot on your own.

The joint is pretty swanky. Customers are seated at tables, and the boys are scattered on risers throught the club. There’s also a mainstage. At one point, I counted at least a dozen men dancing at once. They floor hump and shake groove thangs in G-strings and banana hammocks. From the DJ booth, an obnoxious emcee talks — a lot — to keep vibe pumped up.

On the mainstage, the boys do routines. Sometimes they even lip-synch. The women regulars fawn and treat them like rockstars. And when it comes to tips, these boys do exceptionally well!

Most of the dancers have glamour-shot promo cards that you can get for free at the door. Some of them are wallet-sized.

Drinks are served by waiters in bowties and vests. And the drinks were shockingly cheap: That evening it was $1-drink nite.

In one corner of the club, the women can pay for private dances.

While I was there, Randy “Mr. Master Blasterhimself, above, came to my table to shake my hand — since I was the only dude customer in the club. It was a  nice gesture — to make me feel welcome instead of “Get out of here, faggot.”

However, I didn’t tip any of the dancers. If I did, I think the dancers would feel uncomfortable, and I think the women customers wouldn’t appreciate it either.

Some of the dancers are exceptionally hot, but my gaydar needle wasn’t bouncing like mad. If you can get a female companion to get you in, I highly suggest going — at least once.

Master Blaster Ladies Club, 3094 N. Stemmons Frwy. 214-905-3866. Open Tues-Sat, 7 p.m.-2 a.m. MasterBlasterLadiesClub.com
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