By Jack Fertig


Andy Dick turns 45 on Tuesday. He played the quirky Matthew Brock for five seasons in NewsRadio which ended in 1999. Since then, the bisexual actor has floated around movies and television. We love him voicing Jesus Christ in the animated show, Mary Shelley’s Frankenhole, but  lately he’s been touring with his Andy Dick’s Stocking Stuffer Music and Comedy Show.



With Mars semi-square Neptune enthusiasm and ideals can ignite huge fires. Especially in this holiday season of dreams, trying to dodge disappointments and enthusiastic partying isn’t easy. Focus on meditation, charity and humility.


SAGITTARIUS  Nov 22-Dec 20
Trying to figure out your finances now will only make you crazy. If you must worry about debts, also make a list of assets. Don’t worry about getting it all penny perfect. That will come later.

CAPRICORN  Dec 21-Jan 19
Your efforts to get ahead get costly. Think ahead. Financial success is only a means to comfort and options. Focus on deeper values and keep everything else in proportion.

AQUARIUS  Jan 20-Feb 18
Worries that normally lurk in the back of your head are in your face. Tear them apart and put into perspective. Be adaptable and open without dithering and doubting.

PISCES  Feb 19-Mar 19
The future looks scary for good reason: It ain’t pretty. Still, your imagination is better put to finding light in the darkness than worrying about doom and gloom. Consider that your mission in life!

ARIES  Mar 20-Apr 19
Your friends mean well but they have a poor understanding of what you need to get ahead. Thank them for their support, but be clear on your goals and what it really takes to reach them.

TAURUS  Apr 20-May 20
A tendency to mouth off gets you into trouble. You need a challenge and will find it more trying to develop a deeper appreciation for classical art or music.

GEMINI  May 21-Jun 20
Sexual experiments take you to places you never imagined and prove dangerous. Maybe that’s good, but be careful. This is not the time to experiment with skydiving or recreational drugs.

CANCER  Jun 21-Jul 22
Mad, wild passion is thrilling, but don’t take a rush of hormones and sweat too seriously. Enjoy the moment. If you want to make promises, wait a while and be sure you can keep them.

LEO  Jul 23-Aug 22
Your eagerness and force of personality are a runaway train. Check with colleagues often and be attentive to their processes. Moderation is the key to cooperation and good health.

VIRGO  Aug 23-Sep 22
Safety first. A rush of playful enthusiasm gets you into all kinds of trouble whether it’s a scandal at work or a sports injury. Anything that can work up a sweat may be considered “sports.”

LIBRA  Sep 23-Oct 22
Think about the best you can reasonably hope for and what it would take to get it. This season drips maudlin sentiment that easily provokes disappointments. Keep your balance.

SCORPIO  Oct 23-Nov 21
Efforts to rectify family problems cause more trouble than they solve. Knowing the problem is good. Waving it in everyone’s face, not so much.

Jack Fertig can be reached at 415-864-8302 or

This article appeared in the Dallas Voice print edition December 17, 2010.