Well, not off to a great start. Jon Stewart’s monologue was full of duds — virtually no memorable one-liners. And any awards for Elizabeth: The Golden Age seem misdirected. Still, anything beats the terrible red carpet idiocy. Why did Regis Philbin offer “good luck” to Helen Mirren? She’s a presenter! And shouldn’t you wish that an actor break a leg?

Oh, well, gotta get back to it — there’s another six hours of this.

 — Arnold Wayne Jones

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